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5 bloggable newsitems

In full markbiwwa.com style of course. (We dig the style. We plagiarise. We acknowledge). Here goes the roundup of Monday Morning Blues & News.

 

1. BLACK CAB fury

The UHM has come out in support of the black cab taxis after it was announced that new regulations would prevent them from using the special bus lanes. The black cab taxis are right of course (I never thought I’d say this). The use of fast lanes by taxis is common in most major cities in Europe and I can see no reason why Malta should be the exception. Still more bad planning? Big Yellow Taxi

2. LAWYER TO BE PAID to watch DVDs

It’s not exactly a permanent job, neither is it a dream job but lawyer Joseph Mifsud has been appointed by the court to watch a collection of DVDs that were found in the possession of David Gatt who still stands accused of being involved in an HSBC heist. Apparently the collection includes The Godfather and “films by Bruce Lee”. All in a day’s work eh? Kung Fu Fighting

3. ARRIVA service normalising

It would seem that eight days into the launch – and once the Bus Driver Plot has been thwarted – Arriva’s service will be running on time in most places. Arriva has been obliged to subcontract minor routes for the time being. If the action of the Renegade Bus Drivers was not a sanctioned strike then I would not be surprised were Arriva to sue for damages and losses caused by the disruption. Sabotage

4. In the Net

Labour will experiment the umpteenth revamp of the notoriously error-prone Maltastar.com under the guidance of Evarist Bartolo. Meanwhile Andrew Azzopardi has added his blog to the increasing list of blogs by “old media” pundits. The signs all point to the Maltese MSM belatedly discovering the utility of blogs and blogging. Undoubtedly presence on the net will be even more crucial come next election – we wonder what role an evolved Facebook will play by the time the heat is turned up. Don’t Believe the Hype

5. Sanctioning the Illegal

Finally, the Times reports that plans are underway for MEPA to sanction a number of illegal boathouses in St Thomas Bay and Dwejra. This kind of news is always baffling and frustrating. The “legalisation” of illegally built property is an insult to the law-abiding citizen and an affront to society. Do we care? Bah. I fought the Law?

*IMAGE NOTE: The accompanying image is of Gaetano Scirea. In this day and age when the image and memory of the recently departed are being used as a smokescreen by cowards to hide from their objective responsibility we choose to put up the image of a model footballer who never failed in his line of duty and was an example to all. Storia di Grande Amore

Scirea non telefonava a Bergamo e Pairetto, ed a giocato e dato la sua vita al calcio ed alla Juventus. Quando sputi e spari menzogne sulla nostra maglia insulti un grandissimo uomo come Scirea.

JU29RO

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J'accuse : Teeth

Although a baby’s first teeth usually develop while still in the womb, they actually start to emerge through the gums when the baby is around six months old. We call this process teething. According to the NHS online guide, early teething should not cause a baby any problems – unless it affects feeding, in which case it sucks (or rather literally, it doesn’t).

We’ve heard the phrase “teething problems” used many a time this week of course thanks to Arriva’s bungled arrival into the world of Maltese gemgem, political intrigue and hot suns that would melt even the most defiant revolutionary spirit. I’ll put forward an early caveat (warning) here: yes, I still live in Luxembourg and I have not had the opportunity to try out the system myself so I am speaking purely from an outside point of view – probably by the time I savour the pleasure of an air-conditioned bus trip to Għadira in August it will be a different kettle of fish.

Incisors

The confusion of the first few days of service cannot really all be dismissed as ‘teething problems’. Once you remove the (by now) 70 renegade bus drivers from the equation you still end up with a number of extremely disappointing facts. They range from the obvious (shelters from the sun) to the technically avoidable (ticket machines going loco) to the downright silly (bus size problems on certain routes – Balluta Hill) and to the profanely inept (bad planning of certain routes: including prime suspect Bisazza Street, Mrabat Street and more).

I am aware of the fact that I subconsciously keep trying to give Arriva a break – maybe that stems from having experienced efficient bus systems across Europe that are similar to the plans on paper in Malta. There does however seem to be a gaping absence of ‘local input’ in the planning part. Either that, or the locals involved in the planning were as apt for the job as Hitler would be as a kindergarten assistant in Jerusalem. Is it another case of the ‘ċuċ Malti’? I doubt it. Arriva must know by now that Malta’s transport system is neither that of Athens nor of Berlin or Strasbourg. I am convinced that they are engaging in a lot of listening at this point: taking note of all the tweaks that are needed to mother this baby out of the teething trouble it has. My hopes are still pinned on an eventual success for the company.

Canines

One thing I cannot really accept is Austin Gatt’s position in the whole saga. We are at pains as a people to distinguish between the responsibilities of a ministry and those of a private company that has embarked on a huge project. Gatt’s ministry might be responsible for having chosen Arriva out of a number of tenderers but after that it should be Maltese Public Expectation vs The Boys from Arriva. Gatt does not help by speaking as though he was the CEO of Arriva (vide the driver sacking business) but neither does the mentality that we have been groomed to have: that any service is ultimately given to us by government. We find it hard to understand that a faulty ticket machine is a problem we should track down to some incompetence within Arriva and not in Austin Gatt’s ministry.

I do not say this to defend Austin Gatt or his ministerial minions who have suddenly vanished from sight unable to take the flak for the bad planning. I say this because what we have on balance is a national transport grid: something that would benefit everybody by being efficient – and not just Austin’s men. We all have a duty to scrutinise Arriva’s performance as much as we have a social duty to collaborate with the company and help it through its teething problems where justified. At the end of the day Gatt and his men may push the button on penalty clauses, (just as Arriva was eager to get compensation for the Bisazza Street gaffe), but an efficient transport system is not built on penalty clauses alone.

Molars

It is part of the inevitable course of 21st century Maltese politics that party positions are created by default. The divorce issue gave us a Labour position built by default. Labour never pronounced itself in favour or against divorce. It just defined what it was not: in this case Labour’s position was that it had no party position. The ploy worked for the man in the street who now sees Joseph’s team as the champions of progressive nothingness and is happier for it. We may soon see the same business with Arriva. Joseph’s team will nurture the discontent of the public on this issue. What we will not know is whether Labour’s team are proposing a return to the old Xarabanks or whether they too would be trying to solve Arriva’s teething problems if they take up Austin’s ministerial job.

As things stand Labour need not take a position but will still win sympathy from people who want something different from the status quo. How that will solve the problems of the shelters, the bendy buses, the ticketing machines and the unruly drivers is anyone’s guess. We’ve seen it all before in the VAT-CET saga haven’t we? Same; same but different. The crisis of representation is doomed to continue and trust you me: the teething problems in this case are gargantuan. Blessed are the oblivious for they will vote PLPN and be satisfied.

Got Milk?

Francis Zammit-Dimech penned an interesting article this week in the Times (Vision of a changing nation). In it he distanced himself from the ‘conservative’ vs ‘liberal’ approaches within the PN and made a case for a modern party based on a mosaic structure glued together by values such as the common good and human dignity. It might be a working solution that challenges the clumsily assembled ‘umbrella party’ visions and ‘new liberals’ a-la-Frank Psaila. There is a case to be made here especially if the likes of Zammit-Dimech can manage to convince the party that Christian-Democrats can and will feel comfortable legislating in favour of minority rights based on the common good and human dignity.

We will need to wait and see whether this line can be elaborated further. The parliamentary legislative track record seems to still be confused and is based more on interest-based legislation than clear guiding principles. Even in the seemingly frivolous – such as alcohol sales regulation and that of entertainment – there seems to be an intellectual and ideological dishonesty and hypocrisy at work. How else do you explain that village festas have been given a carte-blanche regarding alcohol sales while a concert organiser has to adhere to strict conditions and pay an exorbitant fee as a guarantee in order to organise his event? This is a simple but effective example of the inconsistencies that are the order of the day when umbrella-parties feeding off conflicting networks try to please the world.

Ironically, the more ‘avant-garde’ (wankellectual if you like) part of the nation seems to be the one sacrificed on a regular basis. Which is why we get censorship problems and why 21st century social habits are still out-lawed (as in not legalised) in our nation. When they do try to find some balls and legislate (see for example cohabitation) they get it all so damningly wrong (not making it available for persons who were previously married).

First Ladies

Ever since Lady Di’s tragic death in 1997 we have witnessed the concept of public grief develop into a hideously impersonal theatrical show pumped up by the media and fed by the big brother syndrome that afflicts the general public. We are not the first generation to suffer from this morbid concern with the remembrance of the deceased that so often smacks of lack of real respect. The Victorians were notoriously fixated with their complicated rules for mourning and dealing with death that culminated with the huge confusion on how exactly to go about the funeral arrangements when the great Queen herself joined her beloved Albert in the sky.

Public outpourings of sentiment tend to become cringe-worthy after a while when it is blatantly obvious that the act of condolence has become automatic rather than genuine. When people start to fall over themselves in a race for the dramatic we slip into the theatrical and the hyperbolic, quickly losing every sense of decorum. In my book this smacks of disrespect to the recently departed. We have not reached the stage of the ancient Romans who would hire mourners to wail and scratch themselves behind the funeral procession but we are risking losing any sense of social decorum by following this folly that is public mourning in the 21st century.

I never met and did not know Mrs Fenech-Adami. She passed away within a day of Betty Ford, the wife of former US President Gerald Ford. Obviously I did not know Mrs Ford either. On a human level I can only offer my sincere condolences to the families of the departed. They are the ones who will feel the biggest emptiness as a dear beloved leaves them for another world.

On a public level I can appreciate the two very different first ladies of two very different nations. Betty Ford was a political animal through and through. She is remembered as a woman who battled for civil rights – pressing for abortion rights and women’s rights during her husband’s presidential period. She never shied from the public view and used her position to push political objectives she believed in. She will be most remembered for her personal fight against drug and alcohol abuse. After having confronted the demons herself in her own private life she transformed the battle into a public one – opening the now famous Betty Ford Centre in California and pressing for further awareness on the issue of drug and alcohol abuse.

Mrs Fenech-Adami could not have been any more different. Her husband’s latest public intervention – when he controversially suggested that divorce was a matter of conscience – highlighted the distinction between ‘moral’ and ‘political’ decisions. Whether or not we agree with Eddie, the stamp of Fenech-Adami’s moral compass was clear to see and it helps us understand the public face of Mrs Fenech-Adami. It is clumsy of us to try to pigeon hole Mrs Fenech-Adami’s public life into a political box. Mrs Fenech-Adami was not political. She was a strong, principled woman with a solid catholic upbringing. From what I can see, that made her the pillar and reference point of her family. We can easily confuse principles and values with humility and ‘knowing her place’, but we would be doing her a great disservice.

I like to see Mrs Fenech-Adami as a moral rock built on the no-nonsense, principled approach that you might disagree with but cannot help but admire. It is with that memory that I offer my sincere condolences first and foremost to the Fenech-Adami family and secondly to the wider family that had gotten used to having someone like Mary as a reference point – in that latter case I can see no reason for anything other than pride.

www.akkuza.com would like to extend another note of sympathy and support in what has been a sad week for some of us. A huge hug goes out to Mark and his family after the loss of a young, vibrant sister, daughter and friend. “Oh heart, if one should say to you that the soul perishes like the body, answer that the flower withers, but the seed remains” (Khalil Gibran).

This is the J’acccuse column from the Malta Independent on Sunday of the 10th July 2011.

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ça chauffe, les chauffeurs

The ARRIVA tsunami continues. The “teething” problems are being dealt with and I am also told that Austin Gatt gave a good performance on Dissett (still got to find time to watch that one on streaming). One of the big deals in the ARRIVA saga has been the issue of working time for the bus drivers. The 57 who tried unsuccessfully to cause a major strike had a gripe about “split shifts” and there were also a number of figures being bandied about with regard to salaries and hourly payments.

Luxembourg’s l’Essentiel has carries an article today about coach drivers for private companies who are complaining about their work conditions. The first comment was a shocking reminder of the arguments made last Saturday by the renegade workers: “The other day I started work at 04.45 and ended at 16.4.5. I got paid as though I had worked 8 hours.” The monthly salary for a private coach worker is 2650€ and the article claims it is 800 or 900 euros less than public service drivers in Luxembourg.

The problem, it seems, is working time and what counts as work and what is not. In their case, the Luxembourg private coach drivers complain that hours waiting for delayed planes at airports are not factored into their salary.

Whether it is Luxembourg or Malta that we are talking about the dignity of the worker is at stake. The question really is one of defining what constitutes working hours and how they are to be calculated. Companies like Arriva who operate in multiple EU countries (UK, Germany, Greece) cannot have the luxury of ignoring EU legislation. It’s one thing denouncing ridiculous demands such as those seen last Saturday, it is another to abuse of a worker’s right to a just salary and proper working hours.

LUXEMBOURG – Les chauffeurs de bus des compagnies privées avouent leur détresse et déplorent leurs conditions de travail

«L’autre jour, j’ai pris mon service à 4h45, j’ai terminé à 16h45. Le tout a été payé comme si j’avais travaillé huit heures». Joël (son prénom a été modifié) et ses collègues n’en peuvent plus de leurs conditions de travail.  Et de leurs salaires. Avec plusieurs années d’ancienneté au compteur, Joël émarge «à 2 650 euros par mois, on a des écarts de salaires de 800 ou 900 euros avec les chauffeurs de la ville de Luxembourg».

Qui plus est, les journées sont longues. «En moyenne, on a une amplitude de 11h30, et il faut y ajouter les trajets entre la maison et le travail. Et on ne nous paye que 40heures par semaine. Sur les transferts depuis l’aéroport, il arrive qu’on attende deux ou trois heures, si un avion a du retard. Ces heures ne sont pas payées. Bien sûr, on peut toujours laisser le bus et aller au café, mais ce n’est pas l’objectif».

Tant qu’à ne pas être payés, les chauffeurs préféreraient passer ce temps «libre» chez eux. «Et j’ai déjà enchaîné plusieurs semaines de six jours de suite, je n’ai jamais vu les jours de récupération auxquels j’ai droit. Ce n’est pas humain ce qu’on vit. Pourquoi tout le monde a le droit de travailler huit heures, et nous, on a juste le droit de crever dans nos bus».

Jérôme Wiss

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I.M. Jack – the one with arriva

I’d like to apologise for the lengthy delay between posts but as many of you may know by now J’accuse has moved house (physically) and is currently living in quasi-total chaos as a variety of EU workers have been scripted for works in the domus. To cut a long story short my house looks a bit more like a war zone and I have little or no access to blogging space. Anyways, as normally happens, much that is bloggable has been happening in our absence so here is a round up of thoughts in I.M. Jack style:

1.  Akkuza on Tumblr

Thought that I’d remind you that little snippets are always available on the J’accuse Miniblog that can be seen at the foot of the blog main page or on it’s own tumblr homesite at www.akkuza.tumblr.com. If brevity is a form of wit then this version of media commentary and photoblog is the wittiest Malta has to offer. Modestly speaking of course.

2. Arriva?

The eventful launch of the Arriva service would merit a blog post all for itself. Instead we will have to make do with a bullet list of observations:

  • The business of the shifts has exposed the real ċwieċ maltin of Tonio Fenech fame. It did not take an Einstein to guess from the start that Arriva weren’t that stupid as to impose law-breaking 12 hour shifts on employees. They did ask for split shifts – a common enough solution in transport systems that also prevents drivers from being behind the wheel for long stretches (not only for their safety but also for that of passengers). Enter the ċuċ malti who combines with the Times’ quest for village paper reporting (Austin’s source in his “rajtha fuq l-internet”) and you have a threatened “strike” by workers who still have not understood what a split shift is after 6 weeks of training. Bring on the “foreigners” then.
  • There is the usual sense of political exploitation in the Arriva saga. Obviously an Arriva success is considered to be a feather in the government’s cap. Again there is an unofficial Labour position. It is not trumpeted as a party position but there is a general buzz around all the failures that is dying to attribute any slip to GonziPN by vicarious liability. Once again the stupid logic of solving national problems (yes, by our standards an efficient transport system remains a national problem) creates more handicaps than efficiencies. Emmanuel Delia has faded into oblivion following the Bisazza Street gaffe – presumably unable to take the flak as his corner of the feather in the cap turned irremediably sour. Austin Gatt, ever the misunderstood bulldozer was right in saying that miscreant drivers should be sacked but what were they thinking taking them on in the first place? The Labour buzz will be happy with the Times’ Village Newspaper reporting about stranded commuters, mysterious machine break ups, and tattoed drivers fuming about having to wear long sleeves. While that speaks volumes about Labour’s opportunism we are yet to hear some form of encouragement to the whole scheme of improvement of transport from their corner. Does that mean that come Joseph Muscat we will have the yellow chuggers back on the road? One man seems to think so.

3. New “kids” on the blog

Somebody has found something to fill his time and avoid the degeneration of his “boredom threshold”. J’accuse welcomes the belated foray by Lou “Can’t Read” Bondi into the interactive world of blogging. You’ll find the babystep blog here: loubondi.blogspot.com. At least Bondi will finally get some first hand experience at running a blog – and handling the comments (though I am sure he will be just as predictably selective as in other media… but who knows?). It was amusing to watch Lou trying desperately to get his readers to leave comments on the blog and not on facebook…. babysteps indeed.

The first foray with “Hey nigga.. you’re an asshole” was an amusing defence of Malta’s traditional standards of journalism and we were pleased to see that it was in direct contradiction to our take on the Times Journalist vs Snoop Dogg” event as exposed in our Sunday Sermon on the Independent. Of course Bondi would think that the journalist had been disrespected… how could he even begin to fathom the expert publicity stunt that modern day rockers/rappers (superstars) can pull just like that out of a mickey mouse-ish hat?

4. DSK released, Inter prescribed

It turns out that Mr Strauss Kahn was (quite probably) a victim of a frame up. In Italy procuratore Palazzi clearly pointed out that Moratti’s Inter were not the clean virgins they made themselves out to be. They are, in my words, GUILTY AS FCUK. It turns out though that enough time has passed since the decisions in 2006 mysteriously set aside much evidence regarding calls by Facchetti and Moratti to allow the facts to be subject to prescription. Here’s a note for Intercettati fans: Prescribed means that you are still dirty bastards but that the law cannot get you. Like Berlusconi for example.

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T.G.I.T.T.C.B

In case you are wondering that stands for “Thank God It’s The Times Comments Board”. In the good old days of early blogging when online newspapers merely reproduced their daily content without a hint of interactivity it was a J’accuse pastime to pick on the weak and deserving – famous among which was the Dame of the Grammatically Incorrect a.k.a. Lorna Vassallo.

Our TGIL section (Thank God It’s Lorna for the uninitiated) flourished in accordance with the Dame’s latest outbursts. Nowadays, thanks to the democratisation of the comment boards – what with online papers vying for the biggest goof allowed to splatter his thoughts to all and sundry under a fitting pseudonym, the sport is a bit like shooting on the Red Cross.

Be that as it may, it does not mean that some sport may not be had with the more prolific of commentators (who incidentally persist in arrogating the moniker of “Bloggers” to their thick selves). Where better to begin than the arduous Frans A. Said from the Times? Here he is commenting on the court hearing of the hit-and-run case in Qawra. We accord him the Lorna Treatment (i.e. my bracketed comments in red).

 

Mr FRANS H SAID

Today, 15:37

I am a frequent visitor to the said area (said area being Qawra – Frans does stick to the Rumpole of the Old Bailey style of writing in order to feel more self-satisfied and pompous when he presses send). Excessive speed is the order of the day (Għamillu Excessive Speed bil-bajd u bacon), any time of the day (Qawra – the city that never slows down). Black exhaust is part of the idyllic scene (decide man – is it idyllic or is it full of black exhaust? Would Manet or Monet have painted Black Exhaust into their landscapes to give it that “idyllic touch”? Et In Qawra Ego). Excessive radio and silencers, but our police are deaf. (This one is worthy of a Lorna Vassallo Prize – the cumulative effort of trying to complain about too many things at once has the effect of nullifying Frans’ argument. Picture (a) Excessive Radio: What is that exactly? Like too many stereos strewn on the kerb? Is he asking for the deliberalisation of the radio waves? (B) Excessive Silencers: Again. Thinking before typing might help Frans. Is this a car that has 20 silencers? If it does, doesn’t it make it very silent? I know he probably means pimped silencers that make more noise but hey who am I to get into Frans Said’s head?And finally (c) the police are deaf: Sorry? Somebody has swallowed an excessive dose of stupid pills today. Let us begin by saying that if the force has decided to become an equal opportunities employer then so be it. But here the complaint seems to be linked – the fact that all the non-sensical phrases combine to one sentence make is a pointer. So checklist time: (a) excessive radio (Bad) (b) excessive silencers (still mysteriously bad) = Conclusion : BUT THE POLICE ARE DEAF. As an illiterate Maltese once asked his English private lessons teacher: because?)

Parking on handicapped slots (OK So Frans is angry but bear with me. What exactly is a handicapped slot? Is it a wrongly painted parking space – a trapezoid parallelogram perhaps?) , but the wardens only appear like rats and disappear again. (And if handicapped slots were not enough, here comes the Gunter Grass of Maltese bloggers (sic). The warden is a rat. Discuss. Does the problem consist of the fact that the warden is a rat (the bastard) or that he disappears (may I point out that the disappearance is repetitive – hence the need to append the word “again” to the end of an already useless sentence).
It is in places like these that speed cameras are required not on the Burmarrad Road (what if they do both frans?). But the Local Council can earn more from Burmarrad than in high tourist areas (the King of Non-Sequiturs. Again we are having problems visualising some of the concepts. What is a High Tourist Area? Is it like a High Elf in Tolkien’s world? Do they walk on stilts? Or is the area itself on some form of plateau?)

But who cares (Delirium sets in just as he was getting hot. He’s tired now and has lost the “question mark” key on his keyboard). The parents do not, as otherwisde they would have hidden the car keys (I’m dying here. The caring parent hides the car keys. Should I really comment?) Who bought such an expensive car/ (Who indeed? The rant against handicapped slots, deaf policemen, excessive radios, excessive silencers, misplaced speed cameras and high tourist areas ends in a very investigative non-sequitur: who bought such an expensive car. Frans’ levels of exhaustion have reached their climax. The question (that gets a slash instead of a point of interrogation) is probably prefaced and followed by a million thoughts that did not find their erratic way from overheated brain to question-mark deficient keyboard. Sadly we’ll never know where the final rhetoric came from).

Finally, do not worry, eventually he will get a suspended sentence, his driving licence (which in any case he does not possess) will be suspended for a few months, and Bob’s your uncle. (What? Me? Worry? No driving licence to suspend and yet Frans thinks it will be suspended. He had to add the “Bob’s your uncle” at the end of the letter. The phrase is currently vying with that other all time favourite “tell it to the marines” as the most uselessly overused phrase among Maltese commentators.)

This has been J’accuse deciphering Frans Said so you don’t have to.

Q. What do you tell a deaf policeman in Qawra who is helping a rat warden issue a ticket to the man who has just spread more radios and silencers across the road?

A. Tell him anything. He can’t hear you.

 

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J'accuse : The Summer Plank

I find the latest Facebook fad in Malta to be quite a happy coincidence. I’m talking about ‘planking’ of course – the ‘sport’ that has taken the Maltese corners of Facebook by storm with adults and kids alike ‘doing the plank’. The phenomenon shows many of the symptoms of any Maltese trend: it is a year or so late by international standards (rather early, that) and it has immediately divided public opinion between the pro and con crowds. And of course there are still those among us who lag behind, completely oblivious to the very existence of ‘planking’ and what it is all about.

Allow J’accuse to come to the rescue. The International Planking rules may be summarised as follows: To perform a plank one must lie horizontally, face down in a rigid stance with no expression whatsoever on one’s face. Legs must remain straight with toes pointed. The idea is to get yourself photographed in that position and then to tag that photo on Facebook with a phrase that indicates your planking intention. The international rules also add that potential plankers must plank safely and not expose themselves to undue risk.

I am told that the planking craze kicked off by chance in Malta when a clumsy attempt to plank over public furniture ended in a disastrous ‘fail’ (another web craze term). Be that as it may, planking has given us a very creative page on Facebook that has quietly slipped to the top of the popularity rankings in the place of the divorce-related pages. The divorce pages are suffering from the fickle attention span of the average ‘internet enthusiast’ and the sudden drought on the web as the summer sun gets people away from the internet and closer to the beach.

Plankuza

The intriguing part of the planking phenomenon is the manner in which it has instigated what I generally think to be a passive-reactive public to become very, very creative. While J’accuse urges respect for public furniture and above all respect for safety we cannot but bow to the genius of the man who ‘planked’ atop a bank ATM canopy on Spinola Hill up to Paceville. It remains one of our favourites. I tried the ‘sport’ myself in the pristine waters of Gћadira Bay (note: I was not the planker but the support that was necessary to elevate the aforementioned planker out of the water). Within seconds of the snapshot there were people around us nodding in enthusiastic acknowledgement and one particular dad set about explaining to his offspring what this ‘sport’ was all about.

Gћadira, by the way, is fast becoming a gem of a beach – at least as long as school is still in session and the boats have not yet started to choke the shores. Cleanliness, organisation and safety are witness to the efforts that have been taken to return our beaches to their natural beauty. I was joined in Gћadira by a friend who travelled there by bus. Actually it was a bus and a hitched ride because the original bus could not make it all the way up the hill to Mellieћa and broke down. Passengers were dumped in the summer sun and my friend who is a veteran visitor to the islands knew better than to wait for a Transport Malta alternative.

It’s sad really that the charming old buses will be leaving the streets. I made it a point to catch at least two rides (and a ferry crossing to Valletta) this time around, and snapped enough photos and collected enough tickets for my little personal scrapbook. On the whole, though, I do not think that the smoke-belching, unreliable monsters will be missed on the streets. If anything, the decision to switch to a new operator with new buses can only be greeted with gladness. I dare the Nationalist government to trumpet this achievement and to expect to reap some rewards of gratitude on this one. It is 2011 after all, isn’t it Emmanuel Delia? The absolute cock-up that was the saga of pedestrian Bisazza Street vs Arriva rescheduling has shown us that even when ushering in the obvious (a working bus system) there seems to be more than an inability to plan ahead.

The Planked

Who will pay for the ‘compensation’ that is due to Arriva for the rescheduling around a major route? Minister Austin Gatt told the press he had no clue what this bill would amount to. The man who seems to be trying to milk all the credit for the occasion, the aforementioned Emmanuel Delia – an unelected civil servant who will be contesting the next election on a nationalist ticket – fluffed with a million excuses and tried to finger the blame onto another Ministry’s late planning. What Delia failed to underline is that whether the bumbling is due to his hopeless planning skills or that of others, the bill is still to be footed by the citizen and nobody else.

The rescheduling has some other citizens up in arms. On my visits to Sliema I noticed many photocopied signs urging Sliema citizens to unite in protest at what is being done to their town. Tigné residents, it seems, are at the heart of this latest NIMBY uprising. Worse still they seem to have been marginalised by the rest of Sliema who are not impressed by the Tigné residents suddenly growing a civil conscience the moment they finally got to be on the receiving end of controversial decisions. But that’s us, isn’t it? The ‘I’m all right and sod you Jack’ mentality pervades across the voting spectrum which is why civil right activists like the tiny, undermanned Alternattiva Demokratika will be allowed into the home throughout a particular NIMBY campaign but will be ditched the moment the big issue of which networker to put in government comes around.

Cultured Planks

I have long bored readers with my idea that our current political set-up is an opiate of the people. The relativist race to zero-value perfection coupled with the nepotist networking that puts planning decisions in the hands of party-favoured goofs serves to neutralise healthy competition, to kill new ideas and to turn us into a nation of unreactive planks. Every now and then you do get some sparks of hope – as I did when attending the conference on Valletta 18 that was a prelude to Valletta’s bid to become European Culture Capital in seven year’s time. There is more about this in the blog but I’d like to say that it would be great if the effort to bridge the gap between the ‘culturati’ and those who currently live the culture unconsciously is actually made. The danger of the liberal arts closing themselves up in an elite group remains dangerously alive.

Speaking of liberals it seems to be the fashion these days for everyone and his mother to display liberal traits. This week I asked Bertu to fashion a cartoon that shows our society’s key players and their attitude towards fashionable liberalism. Just look at the papers over the past week and you will see both major parties falling over themselves trying to expose the liberal side of their ‘umbrella’ (or in Gonzi’s case – ‘rainbow’) movements. Judging by the reactions I have been listening to in social circles, the Maltese voter must be daydreaming his days away or planking to his heart’s content. The ‘we are liberal’ line is being swallowed – hook, line and sinker.

The Unexplained Planks

This week I was ‘accused’ of being too nationalist (particularly in an article in l-orizzont) and of being too anti-nationalist. It made me wonder whether people tend to remember only the parts of the article that they dislike. It does make sense really. Our basic instinct is to have our little electoral Jiminy Cricket conscience always at the back of our mind. He is there to yell out warnings whenever what we are reading challenges our ‘traditional’ voting trend and inclination. So as a nationalist voter you may skim through an article that criticises Joseph Muscat’s opportunist fashioning of his policies (and maybe nod in agreement) but your attention will only peak if (for the sake of example) I call your beloved leader Lawrence Gonzi a plonker (sic).

So as our parties refashion what they represent into two huge blocks of nothing, the voting population will dig its heels in the ground and still think in terms of black or white, red or blue. Their voting conscience remains as immovable and rigid as a planker in pose position. Unfortunately the tsunami of change promised post-referendum has only served to consolidate the ill-advised “umbrella movements” and their knee-jerk reactions.

To the Duchy

My week-long, wedding-related, visit comes to an end. There are a couple of people who I’d like to congratulate. There’s Pierre Mejlak and Chris at Merlin for the wonderful book and launch at Mdina. Dak li l-lejl iћallik tgћid is available online at Sierra Distributors and I would strongly recommend that you get a copy. Then there is the chef at Adira Lido in Gћadira Bay. I really have to thank him for a mixed seafood platter that was an out-of-this-world explosion of Mediterranean taste that would have been enough to make this latest visit home worthwhile. Thanks a million and see you again in August.

 

www.akkuza.com has reviewed Pierre’s latest masterpiece, sat through Valletta 18 and is now gearing for the latest collection of stories for www.re-vu.org. Happy birthday, Kika!

 

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