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Closed for Bachelors

I’m off to Bologna this weekend. I’m supposed to be looking forward to a weekend of drunken excess since I will be “celebrating” my bachelor’s party. The thing is I’ve never been an enthusiastic participant at this kind of event – I’m more like the wet blanket at such occasions. Most times I end up man marking the more excessive and crazy members of the crowd trying to ensure that no physical harm is done.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m the first in line for practical jokes and love a good laugh when the prank is well thought out. It’s just that the wankellectual snob doesn’t relate to the primitive idea of stripping, strapping and throwing up that seems to be the sum total of a bachelor party activity on the island. Give me a “Zingarata” any day… but hell, how do you explain the Monicelli concept in this day and age?

So yep, I am off, packing my bags for the city of three T’s (that’s apparently Tits, Towers and Tortellini). Given that my level of alcohol resistance is that of a three year old thanks to my having switched to tea or diet coke as beverages of choice you may very well hear of a Maltese national having been arrested in Bologna after being discovered trawling the streets naked covered in whatever inventive substance passes as fun at a bachelors these days.

Still. The good thing is that the intercettati will be passing through Bologna on Saturday night. With a bit of luck (make that a lot in my case) I might witness the face of the disappointed intercettato fan first hand. Forza Bologna! Forza Di Vaio!

Back on Monday! (fingers crossed)

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Values

From Crimea to Benghazi

“Nurse of the Mediterranean”, “Florence Nightingale”. These terms are no coincidence and were not invented by some nationalist spinmeister in an effort to boost our “pride” in our country. As Maltatoday picks up on public sentiment and reports that three Maltese patients were moved out of the ITU to make way for injured Libyan persons (you can sense Saviour puffing behind this bit of news), it would do all of us a favour to calm down a little and have a look at the numbers behind all this fuss.

To me the crucial bit of the Maltatoday article is the part that reports the number of Libyan patients threatening to cause havoc with our health care facilities. Given the fuss that has been kicked up by the insensitive NIMBYISTS on one hand and by the superproud heroes of nationalist persuasion on the other you’d have thought we were talking of Lampedusa Thousands. Hah. The real number is 16. Sixteen. That’s a kindergarten class (I think).

Let’s take the hands of time and turn them back a century and half ago. It’s November 1854 and there’s a war in the Crimea. That’s far, far away in Maltese provincial terms but since we were then under the administration of the British Crown we could not afford to ignore the geopolitical realities beyond San Dimitri point. The Crimean War gave the world the Charge of the Light Brigade, familiarity with the word Balaklava and Florence Nightingale. It was also the reason that Malta became, for the first time under British occupancy “the nurse of the Mediterranean”. Before that Malta had already played host to the Knights Hospitaller which is not simply a decorative adjective but an indication of the vocation of the Knights of St. John as medics. Hence the Sacra Infermeria.

But back to the Crimea and Malta. Here is Mr C Savona Ventura in an article I found quickly (not much time for research here) on the net describing Malta’s hospital role and the grand plans by Florence Nightingale herself to design a hospital in Malta. What is immediately striking is the request from Britain to set up to receive 10,000 (that’s ten thousand) war wounded on the island.

The Crimean War of 1854-56 served as a turning point in military medical administration. During the Crimean War Malta served as an outpost to treat wounded soldiers. The Malta Times wrote “Orders were received here from England to prepare quarters for 10,000 men. Several localities are being fitted-up; among others, the Lazzaretto and adjoining Plague Hospital, where it is said there is room for 1000 men, and the Dockyard lofts where as many men can be housed. Convents will be used if absolutely required, but not otherwise.” The first wounded soldiers arrived from the Crimea in November 1854 [17]. (…)

Florence Nightingale in her book Notes on Hospitals first published in 1859 took up the proposal of a new military hospital in Malta. In the 3rd edition of her book dated 1863, Nightingale suggested that a new General Military Hospital should replace permanently the Valletta Station Hospital. (C. Savona Ventura – Military Hospitals in Malta)

If anyone has the time to find the actual figures of how many wounded were treated in Maltese hospitals in World War I and during the Crimean War it should help give us more of a sense of perspective to the political fuss that is being kicked up here.

 

During the First World War, like the Crimean War period, Malta served as a “Nurse of the Mediterranean”. From the Gallipoli campaigns 2500 officers and 55400 troops were treated in the Maltese hospitals, while from the 1917 Salonika campaigns 2600 officers and 64500 troops were treated. The years of the conflict thus required the significant augmentation of hospital beds for injured and sick troops. The number of beds in the Valletta Military Hospital were augmented from 26 beds to 340 and later to 440 beds. This augmentation was achieved by renovating disused wards and bringing the sanitary and medical facilities up to date. The Valletta Station Hospital served as a sorting base for the wounded arriving in the hospital ships prior to their being transferred to the other 30 hospitals and camps scattered over the Islands.  (also from C Savona Ventura – Military Hospitals in Malta)

* this post relies heavily on information gathered from the article “Military Hospitals in Malta” by C. Savona Ventura available here.

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Jasmine

The Pride of Lions

Do you have Independence day hangover? Are you still reeling from the injection of pride in our country and its achievements – especially in its delayed reincarnation as the potential Florence Nightingale of the Libyan Spring? Or are you still feeling rather indignant at the “divisive” call for AST’s resignation? Better still, are you still clutching your aching sides after laughing all night at Labour’s non sequitur style reponse that “if my ex-Foreign Minister was an arsehole then your ex-Leader /PM / President played host to a flurry of arseholes in the early nineties”?

However you may have woken up this side of Independence Day, you will surely have gone through your morning papers and probably, like J’accuse, you’d have noticed the glaring inconsistencies in this proud nation’s dealing with foreigners. Here they are in black and white.

The Black – No to injured Libyans

On the one hand GonziPN’s efforts to weave a new heroic story into the tapestry of our PLPN history books have come under fire from an unexpected source. The (very christian) spokesperson of some Union of Nurses complained that Mater Dei has enough on its hands as it is and does not need to play nurse to any injured Libyans. Paul Pace, head of the MUMN told the government that “bigger countries with more facilities should address such problems”. Boom goes GonziPN’s plans of proud nation humbly serving the weak and the injured. Don’t hold your breath for a Joseph Muscat position on this mess by the way. He either criticises MUMN (read votes) for their tunnel vision or he criticises Gonzi’s plans thus losing cred on his “I love New Libya” mantra.

As for the proud nation sticking its neck out for others – here is the best source to tap the pulse of the nation … the Times online comment board:

Ms Maria Vella

Today, 09:59

Let us stop being all politically correct and call a spade a spade!

Mr. Pace did not beat around the bush and stated the situation as it is. We have enough Maltese patients (who pay taxes and contribute towards the running of this hospital) waiting for treatment, in corridors or at home, or even worse sent home because of lack of space but we find place and resources to treat foreigners.

Whilst my sympathies go towards the injured Libyans, charity should begin at home!

Now there’s a thought Mr. Prime Minister. A sympathy card to Libya and that’s that. Where’s Tonio Borg when you need him?

The White – Yes to rich magnates

Frank Salt, of Frank Salt properties, describes the new conditions for obtaining a residency in Malta as “a large hammer being used to crack a delicate egg” (TOM – Messing with the economic motor). Apparently the new conditions for your average Russian euro-burner to settle down in Malta are “very complicated, extraordinarily expensive, virtually prohibitive” – dixit Frank. It seems that the developers’ apple cart has been upset:

Was it sensible for the authorities to continue to allow new building developments specifically targeted at potential new foreign buyers, to sprout up all over our Islands, when they knew that they were about to unload this bombshell, that would and could, and no doubt will, upset the whole apple cart?

And the property developers are angry. They’re angry at the government that encouraged them to develop land to sell it off to Non-EU citizens (not injured Libyans mind you… for that we have Mater Dei) and then came up with these conditions. Here’s Frank being Frank again:

Today, the local property industry first works its backside off promoting Malta as a safe, inexpensive and pleasant place in which foreigners and their families can come and live in peace. Then, when the market gets off its feet, quality developments are built, foreign residents, permanent and temporary come to Malta to see whether they would like to live here… bang… once again it is time to mess things up.

And then there is the music for the environmentalist’s ear:

Now we have to see how we are going to sell the hundreds of properties that are currently on the market and those hundreds more that have new permits to build.

Dunno Frank. I’m thinking that you should sell some of that space to … lemme see… a Qatari developer who could then invest some of his money into … hmm… a hospital. There would  be some divine justice in that wouldn’t there? An exclusive hospital built to service the wounded and injured from the Arab Spring. The developers would get their money. The nurses would get their break from the influx in Mater Dei and the government would sell this off as some smart move. Lovely no?

Finale

Of course mine is a tongue in cheek suggestion to Mr Salt. What really jars is the existence of this reality on our tiny rock. On the one hand we have those christians who cannot accept the idea that our valuable hospital space is being taken up by “foreigners” (stop bleeding on my soil) and on the other we have those business minded few who are dying to get the right type of foreigner (those who bleed money) to our shores.

It’s normally Joseph Muscat’s job to blame Gonzi for everything under the sun (including tsunamis and world economic crisis). I’d just say simply that our political establishment are getting the “proud” citizens they have nurtured and that they deserve.

What you reap is what you sow. Maybe it’s time to wake up.

 

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Mediawatch

Mass Downgrade

There was a time when the day after “mass meeting” events would be spent combing the papers comparing snapshot to snapshot of the human flood that would have filled the appointed spot at the appointed time. Pre-election polls in Malta were conducted with an expert off the cuff assessment (if you excuse the oxymoron) of the number of flag waving homini partisani who crammed every nook and cranny of Il-Fosos. That was then – when a silly tune like “We take a chance” could guarantee more votes than a commitment on Waste Recycling and when everybody could dance the night away happy that our economy was boosting and F’par idejn sodi.

I went through the papers – those sympathetic to government and their online version to look for the photos of the “masses” who were supposed to have spent three days of hedonistic remembrance and instead all I could find were close-ups of Lawrence Gonzi and Paul Borg Olivier. Was something being hidden from our prying 80’s mentality? Had the PN masses failed the ultimate fidelity test? Had they not crammed the beloved fosos while singing their anachronistic innu tal-kattolċi u tal-Latini? Apparently not. Here’s the party mouthpiece MaltaRightNow letting the numbers slip while describing part of Prime Minister Gonzi’s speech:

Lista ma tispiċċax illi ġiet elenkata mill-PM u Kap tal-Partit Nazzjonalista Lawrence Gonzi meta indirizza lill-mijiet miġbura fuq il-fosos tal-Furjana għall-mass meeting li bih għalqu l-festi tal-Indipendenza bit-tema ‘Kburin b’pajjiżna, għax nemmnu f’pajjiżna.’

Mijiet. That’s hundreds. Not thousands. Hundreds.

Just saying.

 

(Happy Independence Day)

Later on J’accuse: More on why Labour is intent on plugging the “PN are too partisan” line, how the PN attempted to rewrite six months of Maltese fence-sitting  in the libyan saga, and how telling us that Labour is no good alternative is not exactly our idea of a plan for our future (Pjan ċar u konkret għall-futur)

 

Independence Day Speech (4th of July): “We can’t be consumed by our petty differences any more” (or don’t you think that Joseph Muscat would look good in a bomber jacket?)

 

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Euroland

Press Standards & Poor Berlusconi

Italy’s sovereign debt rating has been revised downwards (A from A+) by Standard and Poor’s. The marginal comment to this revision was that the country’s outlook was “negative”. Notwithstanding Berlusconi’s “manovra” that seemed to have appeased worries in the institutional corridors of Brussels, the credit rating agency “cited fears over Italy’s ability to cut state spending and bring its finances in order, particularly given the country’s growth prospects.” (BBC)

The Italian government’s reaction to this revision is once again redolent of the double-vision that is evident in every major capital in Europe these days. On the one hand there is the inevitable reality that is a euroland crisis that is crying for a common solution (common because of the interdependence of the euroland states) while on the other hand there is the survival instinct of the parties in government eager to avoid losing valuable election points in the national microcosm.

Malta’s Labour has been lashing at Gonzi & Co. for what they claim is the “ostrich” mentality that has overcome Pietà and Castille. The tune from Labour and other critics of government is that the Government has “conveniently ignored” Moody’s recent downgrading. For its part, barring the bravado of mavericks like Austin Gatt, the party in government seems to be content with the government by default line that has worked so well in recent years. While it is true that Labour is far from offering a practical alternative to the current men at the driving seat, it is also blatantly evident that the government by default lacks a coherent, value-driven and globally conscious plan. Surely a tough nut to crack for voters.

Back to Berlusconi and his government. The first reaction to the S&P revision was a tirade on the fourth estate. His government and its manoeuvres was not to blame – instead it was the bad feeling and lack of confidence generated by the papers. Pity that the stock exchanges in Milan and elsewhere seemed to be more on the wavelength of S&P and the papers than on Berlusconi’s side. Here is part of Palazzo Chigi’s official reaction (from La Stampa):

«Il governo ha sempre ottenuto la fiducia dal Parlamento, dimostrando così la solidità della propria maggioranza. Le valutazioni di Standard & Poor’s sembrano dettate più dai retroscena dei quotidiani che dalla realtà delle cose e appaiono viziate da considerazioni politiche»

The question is whose reality (realtà) is the real one and whose is the virtual?

The truth is out there.

 

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Articles

J’accuse: Doves in hawk’s clothing

During the Vietnam War, public opinion in the United States of America was virtually split in half between two factions that came to be known as “the hawks” and “the doves”. The monikers speak for themselves − hawks were the advocates of war while the doves were those who plugged more peaceful solutions. Such a description obviously risks being an oversimplification of the issues behind the Vietnam War, but I guess you get the drift.

Food for the masses

The run up to the 21st September celebrations is always seen by the Nationalist Party camp as a great time to drum up a feel-good feeling about the nation and its government (especially when the Nats are the ones at the helm). The orchestrations of the orgy of mass celebrations are the modern daughters of Speer’s efforts in Nuremberg that were handed down through generations via Mintoff’s slapstick parades complete with songs of adulation for the great leader. The Nationalist Party is not at its most confident. Still reeling from the disastrous handling of the divorce issue and from the complete failure of its concept as a party of diversity, it is in great need of a morale booster − its been angling around for a winning theme ever since the Arriva flop took the last feeble breeze out of its sails.

Even this week it lost some (minor) pieces of its organisational puzzle, as Pierre Portelli first (rumour has it that his Watermelon productions did not get all it wanted on NET) and Castaldi Paris later (will he do a Cyrus and switch sides before the big day?) ditched their roles within the party infrastructure. The Nationalist world does not begin and end with Portelli and Castaldi Paris and the government members of the PN would do better to focus on the economy than on the bickering among the growing club of prima donnas within the party’s fold. The euro debt crisis needs quick, clear thinking and the PN focus should not be distracted by the tantrums of its disaffected members or by the loud and empty noises being made by the Man Without a Plan.

Still. A theatrical drum roll is always needed before Gonzi of GonziPN can bark about achievements and order his minions to build their next year on hope. Selling hope is hard these times even if you are Obama, let alone Gonzi with his crumbling party. So what do you hang onto? Well the formula has always been “Religio et Patria”. The religio bit is not that sellable right now, what with the divorce setback and the Church’s woes, so Gonzi had best keep a wide berth of the spiritual infusions of pride right now. Which leaves him with patria.

Clout

This week’s news has been carpet bombed with info about Malta’s role in the Libyan Revolution. After six months of fence-sitting silence, we first got the shameless finger pointing about whose nights were best spent whoring away with the former Libyan tyrant.

Now we have suddenly become the pro-active nurse of the Mediterranean ready to pounce back into Libyan territory with a major role. So while the modern day Nelson and Napoleon were committing themselves to more assistance (such as they have been providing from day 1) in Tripoli and Benghazi, we were regaled without little narrative of heroism: Malta was to care for Aline, Gaddafi’s ex-nanny. We can be heroes too.

We got a full Times of Malta report with AFM in full regalia and Malta’s very known “Head of Defence” in the OPM speaking to the press about a “collective effort” to bring back two wounded Libyans and to ensure that our embassy and consulates would be bomb-free. It wasn’t exactly Obama speaking from the stairs of Air Force One, but you got the nagging feeling that this was an effort to conjure up memories of valiant Maltese battling it out again so close to Victory Day. It was very Hollywoodian. All that we needed was a Maltese Will Smith complete with cigar and smile celebrating his valiant escape from the clutches of the alien. You know the scene I’m referring to: Independence Day is the movie and it includes a stirring speech by a Hollywood Leader of a Nation.

The Nationalist Party may have lost its media wizard who is now busy with Watermelon, but they still seem to be fixated with directing real life Hollywood sagas. The Floriana Fosos will be the stage for narrating the latest step in the PLPN construction of Maltese history, featuring once again one of the comic protagonists. Let’s hope that Lou Bondi does not get to write part of the script. Writing in his blog (Shweyga, you are welcome here) to the tune of this latest theme of pride in the patria he prepares to welcome Shweyga (the ex-nanny) with open arms and concludes: “And we should be proud that the first civilised land that she should set foot on is ours”.

We are Maltese

Shweyga is Ethiopian and moved to Libya for work. That makes it at least two other countries that she set foot on before ending up in Malta’s hospital facilities. Two other countries before she reached “civilised” Malta. I wonder if Lou really thinks that Ethiopia and Libya do not qualify as “civilised” countries or whether he just got carried away with his enthusiasm about the fact that finally, seven months after the Libyan revolution began, Malta is actually committing itself to something.

There was a Maltese film some time ago that looked like a spoof of Hollywood-style movies such as “Independence Day”. The catch line for the film was “We are Maltese, we don’t take no shit”. Sure we don’t. Once the battle is practically won. Once it is practically sure that Gaddafi is but a squeaking mouse in a corner. Once the rest of the international community has moved on. And above all once we realise that our inertia might cause us to miss any “business opportunities”. Then. Only then. We don’t take no shit. We are, after all, a pretty civilised country.

Down Under

So the Nationalists are busy building the new narrative that will hopefully sell packets of pride along with the imqaret and fenek on the stands. Merkel and Sarkozy are still trying to solve the euro debt crisis. For some real time distraction there’s nothing better than the Rugby World Cup in New Zealand. I’ve just watched Ireland defeat the Wallabies in a great encounter. I don’t normally watch rugby outside World Cup season but there are some aspects of the sport (apart from the get-up of the Australians) that are fascinating.

For example, I love the way that the penalties are taken. The penalty taker strides with the confidence of a Beckham-Ronaldo hybrid before performing a dance that seems to be inspired by a combination of a lovesick matador and a llama readying to spit in the eye of its next target. There is a silent moment − a dance on the spot in true tap dance style then the run to the ball and the kick… up, up and beyond. It’s these sporting moments that make life worth living.

www.akkuza.com is in sports viewing mode and is contemplating adopting Finnish side Inter Turku as a new underdog to follow. www.re-vu.org has a new book review up for discussion.

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