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Simply über alles

Were they not absolutely fantastic? When they trounced the hapless English team by four goals to one (almost to two) many were those who would have easily subscribed to the “even my vindaloo eating granny could do that” philosophy. In short we were prepared to concede that the merit of the four goal drubbing of the Three Lions had little to do with some kind of footballing superiority of the mannschaft and more to do with the absolute disregard to the notions of basic football exhibited by Postman Pat’s XI.

Here at J’accuse we had been viewing the battle between Good and Evil (it’s a matter of perspective) as a fight for the right to be soundly given a lesson in football by the princes of South American football (there can only be one king and he normally comes from Rio or Pernambuco).

Yet here we are today looking back in awe and disbelief as we contemplate the complete and utter capitulation of the mullet plagued team from the City of Good Winds. It must have been an ill wind that carried Bastian Schweinsteiger’s cross lightly but surely over the rudderless orphans of Javier Zanetti and Walter Samuel as the young Muller soared over the ill-organised ranks of the Argie excuse for a defence  and gave the ball a sufficient twist of momentum and direction to overcome any last ditch attempt from the pony-tailed guardian to keep it out of his nest. There would be more to follow as the young German team refused to be dazzled by the supposèd new kings of entertainment football.

The secret to German success turned out to be no secret at all. You could tell as the game unfolded that they were doing what they could do best – they kept it simple. They passed the ball when a pass was needed, crossed it right when the cross was begging and shot the ball into the net with a beguiling simplicity that left anyone watching the match absolutely gobsmacked. You could not believe it when Klose was busy somersaulting in the air much to the chagrin of  Lionel and Carlos. You rubbed your eyes in disbelief as Schweinsteiger and Lahm ran riddles round the albiceleste men. Like Uruguay before them these men had not read the script. And thank heavens for that.

You gotta love ze germans

For yes, in an ideal world the World Cup final should have been a matter between the two constellations of verdeoro and albiceleste with the supposedly cynical Europeans having packed their bags for home long ago. But that is the ideal world of press, precedent and hype that fails to take account of the truth of the game. The truth is that if it is in the game, it’s in the game. When the ball gets stroked around with such gusto and flair and with an ambition to prove oneself (as against believing that just wearing the yellow or blue and white shirt is enough) with every tackle, with every pressing and with every true ball. When the ball seems to join in the fun fluttering obeyingly from foot to foot to goal with the ease of an alphabet recited then there truly is the secret that opens the doors to the Olympian height of world cup victory.

We have a German team to thank for this revelation. For the truth that football is beyond words and hype and commercialism. It all boils down to the simple rules of the game that dictate that to win a match you have to score more than your opponents, pass the ball at the right time, cross it believing it will get to the feet of your attacker and slip it in with the calm and certainty that this is the most important kick of the ball in your life. Each and every one of them. Calmly executed, perfectly performed, world Class playing.

Simple above all.

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Sport

Out and About

So the Selecao is out. It was a fifty fifty match but in the end the team with a stronger and deeper reserve of personality won. You would not believe that the Felipe Melo own goal brought the result to a draw. You could see it in the eyes of Snejder, Robben & Co. they could feel the victory coming. Melo, Cesar and Luisao began to practice the sad faces long before the game was jeopardised. In the end Brasil would go out to two set pieces, to their own inabilityy to continue believing that they could outclass the Oranje in the second half as they did in the first and to the crass imbecility and unprofessionalism of Juventus’ 25 million euro star – Felipe Melo. What was he thinking?

Soccer romantics would not mind the Netherlands going all the way now vindicating the near misses of Cruyff’s generation in’74 and ’78. There’s a few underdogs to reckon with and as I type Africa’s dream and the historic champions face each other for the right to challenge Holland’s cynical XI. J’accuse will throw it’s full support behind the winner of tonights match – the sympathy ratings are high. As the iTV commentator said “a country takes on a continent”. One last comment (call it sour grapes if you like) but when did the Japanese ref plan to book Van Bommel? 4 cardable offences and kicks from behind went unnoticed. No prob. Next stop Brasil ‘2014 and I’m planning to watch that world cup in the host country.

Bonde Brasil Copa 2010
Image by RodrigoLobo.com via Flickr
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Seleção – updated

Insofar as support is concerned, this corner of the web has two hearts that beat blindly. One is coloured black and white and the other, more fanatic one, is coloured green and gold. We held back from commenting the early forays of the seleção especially since we rarely believe that the first three matches of a WC offer any verdict other than IN or OUT.

Dunga’s Brasil are light years away from offering the “jogo bonito” that he tough Brasilian supporters expect year in year out. I too have given up on really “watching Brasil play”. Instead we are regaled with fiammate of genius interspersed with solid, pragmatic displays that take the best of what football has to offer with a very pragmatic perspective. Dunga’s Brasil would take a 1-0 victory home any day but time and time again it has offered unexpected goleadas even when the usual suspects where not around.

Forget O Fabuloso and Robinho (who has a magnificent track record vs Chile – 5 games/6 goals) – the man to watch is Juventus’ Felipe Melo. It has become more and more evident that he is the metronome of the team. His presence as a dam infront of the defence allows Kaka and the forwards to weave their magic one-twos and bursts. Melo and Dunga are like man and God… the former has been formed in the shape of the latter and that is probably why the Brasil coach has so much faith in the much maligned Felipe Melo.

Melo plays with a swollen ankle tonight. He has been Brasil’s Dr Jekyll to Juve’s Mr Hyde. Juve fans watched him in desperation as they hoped he would justify his 25 million tag only to be disappointed time and time again. In the first few matches with the seleção he has become an insurmountable figure on which the goal machine falls back when the going gets tough (true there is the not too ignorable presence of Lucio and Juan behind him).

Will Melo & Co overcome Chile with the same ease as the last eight encounters against los Riojas? It remains to be seen. Brasil are normally at their most worrying when they enter a match that seems to be a foregone conclusion. Also it remains to be seen how many Brasililan feet will get kicked about by a desperate second choice Chilean defence. Fingers crossed and lets hope that the ghosts of 1950 and 1982 – when Brasil was meant to be the inevitable victor – do not return to haunt Dunga’s braves.

Go Brazil!

***
UPDATE

So they won. Melo did not play in the end but Ramires replaced him well enough. The early forays into Brasilian territory where not enough for Bielsa’s plucky XI and Brasil built their victory with bloks of European cynicism coupled with moments of individual flair and strokes of magic. Kaka is slowly filling in the shoes of unsung maestro of this team distributing the passes with nonchalant tempo.

Hats off to Chile though. Like the Americans before them, they had the neutrals thrilled with their pluckiness, their enthusiasm and their unwillingness to play to some unwritten script. Well done Chile and it really is a pity that the knock-out round had to come about at some point. We cross our fingers as we wait for the Oranje next Friday.

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If you think it's all over

Well. That’s a bit cliché really and I am not the kind of person to gloat over the losses of most teams (Argentina, Inter and Roma most years being the glaring exceptions) so this is not really intended as a sort of lemon-full post for Enger-land supporters. I could have easily bet a few quid on the three lions going all the way this year right before the world cup started.

The jerky knees they showed during the group round should have been enough to dampen any serious hopes for Capello’s troupe of WAG-less enthusiasts and although the press egged them on for the Germany match as though the freedom of Western Europe depended on it they would not have scared a toddler in a mad house. And so to this afternoon’s match. They played they were seriously ouwitted by the mainsschaft of youngsters and immigrant imports and they are on the next plane to London.

Two questions for the England fans:

1) It is rumoured that Capello promised the players a night with the WAGs should they overcome the Huns. How motivating can that be for all the team bar Terry ? I mean – letting the WAGs loose with Terry around – do you think the rest of the team would lock him in the cupboard till their better halves are back out of sight?

2) And now a more serious question. I am sure many of you are calling for the introduction of the Eagle Eye and Replay – replays during the match that would have pointed out to the referee that that rebound on the free kick was almost 50cm beyond the line. But if, unlike Blatter, you would like to review the game with hindsight what should stop us? What stops us from a “moralist” revision of past matches? Imagine this one – England’s non-goal today is allowed IF (and only IF) they accept that the 1966 goal was NOT a goal and the match is to be replayed. Would you accept that? Would you be willing to risk  relinquishing a world cup won on a phantom goal to be able to kick off both games (1966 & 2010) again at 2-2? Guess not.

Here’s a dedication to England football fans from their Scottish cousins.

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Sport

Gufi on Record

Seeing how we have been taken to task on our objective reporting of superstitious elements we will set the record state. We will grant that Intercettati were Champions in 1938 before Mussolini‘s XI lifted the cup. (Mussolini’s XI won both 1934 and 1938 so Inter and Juve get an ex aequo in the not too sporty pre-war editions).

1930 – Inter (3) – DNQ

1934 – Juventus (6) – Campione

1938 – Inter (4) – Campione

1950 – Juventus (8) – 1o turno (superga)

1954 – Inter (7) – 1° turno

1958 – Juventus (10 *) – DNQ

1962 – Milan (8) – 1° turno

1966 – Inter (10 *) – 1° turno

1970 – Cagliari (1) – Finalista

1974 – Lazio (1) – 1° turno

1978 – Juventus (18) – 4° posto

1982 – Juventus (20 **) – Campione

1986 – Juventus (22) – Ottavi

1990 – Napoli (2) – 3o posto

1994 – Milan (14) – Finalista

1998 – Juventus (25) – Quarti

2002 – Juventus (26) – Ottavi

2006 – Juventus (29) – Campione

2010 – Inter (17) – 1o turno

The Record.

With Juventus as champions (9 times) Italy performed as follows: 3 times winners, 1 time fourth place, 1 time quarter-finalist, 2 times eighth-finalist, 1 time exited first round, 1 time DNQ.

With Inter-cettati as champions (5 times) Italy performed thusly: 1 time winners, 3 times 1st round exit, 1 time DNQ.

Other teams have too low a record to compare probabilities. The only other team who won more than one time before a WC is Milan and their record is still too low for probability: 2 times champions before WC and 1 time exit first round, 1 time finalist. A 50% chance of a good WC I’d say (or of a bad one if you saw it from the Intercettati point of view.

The facts are clear. Try as they might Intercettati will attempt to wriggle away the 2006 campionato claiming it as their own. While we still await the further developments on Moratti & il Defunto’s phonefest we will simply remind them that Italy’s 2006 world championship team was built on the team that won the campionato on the pitch. It is a glaring inconsistency to wave the flag for Italy singing Seven Nation Army one minute then claiming that that very same team would not easily have won the campionato without much help.

So back to the issue of objective reporting. First of all we never claim to be (objective). But even if for a second we tried to be so, the facts as shown above are obvious. With Juventus Champions 7 times out of 9 Italy obtained a decent result for a team of its stature. With Inter Champions that same nation got a decent result 1 time out of 5.

We said it once. We say it again.

Inter – Gufi d’Italia.

La realtà dei fatti è che quando la Juventus vinceva, la Nazionale volava. L’ultima volta, appunto, nel 2006. Oggi, che la Juventus ha fatto uno dei campionati peggiori di tutta la sua storia, la Nazionale esce quasi in silenzio, quasi dalla porta di servizio, quasi senza dignità. E forse il “quasi” andrebbe tolto.

I politici del calcio hanno voluto distruggere la Juventus e innalzare l’Inter a bandiera nazionale; l’Inter ha ripagato i politici del calcio perseverando nella sua politica esterofila, e abbandonando i suoi benefattori al loro destino. C’è della giustizia, in tutto questo; la Juventus non ha mai tradito l’Italia. Vinceva e proponeva blocchi vincenti. Però si sa che tutti i nodi, prima o poi, vengono al pettine, e oggi, con la questione Calciopoli 2, c’è la possibilità di ricostruire la storia, prima di svegliarsi un mattino e scoprirsi irrimediabilmente calvi.

Quella odierna, difatti, è solo l’ultima delle umiliazioni subite; quelle precedenti sono storia recente. Se dico “Blatter e la Coppa del Mondo 2006”, se dico “Europei 2016”, se dico “coppa del mondo restituita da un giocatore francese” penso che possa bastare.

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Inter – Gufi d'Italia

It’s the words we like so much at J’accuse (the Banana Republic)… “We told you so”. Do you remember this post way back on the 6th of May? We warned the superstitious among you that Italy might be in for a bad time. The only two previous world cup tournaments in which Italy walked out at the first hurdle were 1954 and 1966. The league winners in the pre-WC season? Internazionale FC (now known as Inter-cettati).

Four years ago Inter fans were among those celebrating the Campioni del Mondo charade at the same moment that the World Champion team were “relegated” to serie B. This year they celebrated their Champions league “triumph” and other victories they have enjoyed thanks to their having escaped the long arm of the law (until now). Somehow, somewhere there is a little bit of poetic justice. They hang on to the reputation of eternal losers and harbingers of bad luck for the national team. Italy is out of the World Cup in another Inter campionato year. Who knows… maybe Moratti will buy Vittek now.

This is the original 6th May post entitled Superstition:

If you’re an England supporter and ever so slightly superstitious then you should be rooting for Labour. The general election of March 1966 elected Harold Wilson‘s Labour vindicating his early call in order to increase his then slender majority of seats. Four months later England’s football team would lift the world cup for the first and only time.

There’s all sorts of superstitions or quirks related to elections. One has to do with rain. Apparently Labour voters are supposed to be more likely deterred by bad weather – though this theory has been rubbished in practice.

For Italy supporters there’s another interesting coincidence. Three times out of four the team winning the campionato before an Italy world cup success has been Juventus: 1934, 1982, 2006. The odd one out has been Bologna (1938). Inter won a pre-WC league in 1954 and 1966. In 1954 Italy were eliminated in the first round by Switzerland (4-1 in playoff). In 1966 they also failed to pass the first round hurdle when they were eliminated by the memorable Pak Doo Ik goal (North Korea).

I’d hate to be an Italy supporter this year!

Harold Wilson
Image by rofanator via Flickr
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