Category: Campaign 2013

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Campaign 2013

The Barrel’s Bottom

Did you ever wonder where we got the expression “scraping the bottom of the barrel”? Why the barrel? What’s wrong with the bottom? Well it comes from the time when fruit – apples for example – were stored in barrels and the apples that would be left at the bottom of the barrel would be bruised and not the best quality. Hence “scraping the bottom of the barrel” or choosing from what is left. Choosing from among the worst because you have no other choice. Yep, you can see where I am going with this but I cannot help it can I?

Here we are getting ever closer to E-day (that’s election not ecstasy) and the level of political discourse has descended into predictable levels of exchanges of circum tauri (that’s bullshit in the vernacular). Do you remember those early halcyon days when we all yearned for political programmes/manifestos to be published so as to see what the parties have to offer or criticise? Well they came and went in a flurry of billboards, buzzwords and bull. We are now left with the dark side of politics doing the works.

The gullibility gene is not very common in my family and therefore I insist on looking at what  the parties have to offer with a critical eye that is above any partisan impulse – much to either side’s chagrin of course. So, at this point, what do the parties have to offer to the arms-length observer? Nothing. Well, not nothing really but an exchange of accusations and finger-pointing that are meant to point out to us that “the other side” is up to its neck in corruption.

Joseph’s Labour is high on a wave of enthusiasm. It has mastered the “unity” con to perfection. Hi party spent five years spinning the yarn that Malta is the pits and practically in need of salvation with half the country (or more) living in appalling conditions and who cannot afford the slightest bit of distraction let alone luxury. Built on the platform of the expensive utilities, wrought around the eccentricities of Franco Debono’s earthquakes and decorated with the stucco of “the face of change” complete with new logo and the  practical disapparition of the political party, Joseph’s movement spun it’s own fairytale where the inevitable conclusion would be a brighter future under what would supposedly be a government for all.

Underneath all the rhetoric lie a ramshackle set of populist measures and a team that is far from promising for the future. Yet the plan sells. It sells mainly because the build up fed what Maltese know how to do best and that is be generally dissatisfied and grumble. It also sells because the other lot have proceeded down the slippery slope to mediocrity and have become an easier target than ever.

In fact, speaking of the other lot, what were they thinking? The blue and red faces from the latest billboard must win the prize for the worst premeditated electoral gaffe ever. The nationalist don’t only seem to have lost it but they are also forming committees trying hard to find out what “it” is and how to possibly bring “it” back. For one time too many they have fallen in this false trap laid by Joseph’s minions – playing into the role of “evil divisive party”. They don’t even seem to understand the fallout of this “blue or red face” business in real terms. “Look beyond the rhetoric” they tell us. Sure. We’re trying but there’s nothing, nowhere.

The truth is out there but nobody seems to be bothering to look for it. The panem et circenses of the parties’ criminal spin has reached new heights of popularity. Labour are trying their damnedest to link the PN (and particularly Minister Gatt) to the oil scandals. Joseph keeps dropping hints that are supposed to “raise eyebrows” but end up being intellectual demi-farts that can only be fawned upon by a journalistic class that has been trained to ask “How high?” whenever he says “jump”. Truth is there is nothing linking the PN or government to the oil commissions. It is definitely a corrupt web that has been uncovered but a web that could have existed under any government.

Then the PN comes along and brings out its undercover recordings. Sure we have documented evidence of dirty business in party clubs being covered up by high level party members – a deputy leader and now possibly a leader to boot. It’s bad. Very bad. But something tells me that party clubs across the island are not exactly hosting M.U.S.E.U.M. meetings as the nationalist party pole dancing club proved back in 2010. Then again there’s another point to be made here. Why did the PN bring out 2010 recordings now? Was it ok to sit on them for so long?

The tired spin is now going to extremes. We are in what I call a Magritte moment – you are slammed with a pipe right in front of you and then you are told “This is not a pipe”. What I find is that the more time passes the more the enthusiastic carcading voters are willing to believe the words that are being channelled into their head and not the big picture that is being painted so clearly before them.

In a normal world the picture would tell them a very clear message: that not everything (if anything) is right in both the houses. Yes, I will take the arrogant position and judge voters by accusing them of ignoring the possibility of an alternative vote. While both parties scrape the bottom of the barrel we should be dismissing them as an option. At least those of us who refuse to have our intelligence insulted. We should not be carried away by the simple puerile motivation of “they’ve been too long in power” or “they haven’t changed one bit”. Instead of letting the filth cancel each other out and returning to our instinctive partisan bias we should be rejecting the idea of abetting the return of the PLPN hegemony to power one more time.

There are no more excuses not to vote different. No amount of baseless accusations about “wasted vote” or “responsible voting” should stand in the way of a nation that desperately deserves much more than this barrel-bottom politics that it so gullibly accepts every five years or so.

This time round you could really make the difference. It’s either that or more of the usual shit guaranteed.

 

 

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Campaign 2013

Truth be told

The Eagle Party held a mass meeting this morning in Zabbar and it turns out that there were more than a handful of people who were willing to go along with the farce. I wouldn’t worry much about all these people voting for Nazzareno when push comes to shove, they were just there for the fun of the outing and for doing what Maltese do best: make fun of the village idiots. Tomorrow the village idiots will be out in force at the respective mass meetings of the two parties who are currently embroiled in a battle of scandals and finger pointing.

Which is where we left them. The parties I mean. In my last post I complained about the surreal obscenity of the fact that every election campaign will peter out into a series of scandals and counter-scandals. All that promise at the start of this campaign what with saving money on energy bills and tablets for all soon changed into mud-slinging of the highest order. The charade unfolds as I type and it’s like seeing the Emperor’s New Clothes – only this is the whole political establishment prancing around naked and ugly for all to see. Recordings? Ministerial Swiss accounts? Oil? Enough. Really. Enough. And here’s why.

Truth be told I still believe that Austin Gatt did not touch a penny of whatever was  going on in the procurement business. Truth be told I believe that there really is a web of corruption surrounding the oil procurement but I also believe that this was a group of persons taking advantage of a loophole  in supervision that was as wide as a house. Truth be told I believe that the Labour party knows that and does not want to admit it because it is politically convenient to “raise eyebrows” about Gatt’s involvement.

Truth be told I cannot digest Austin Gatt’s excuse that he “forgot” to declare his family accounts in Switzerland since 2005 – inherited or not. Truth be told I find the double standards in this respect to be glaring when contrasted to the treatment of AD’s chairperson in 2008 for having forgotten to pay some VAT dues over a defunct company.

Truth be told I find Joseph Muscat’s ridiculous throwing of “leads” to his former work colleagues with regards to a Minister who supposedly freed someone from a chip or a lock up disgusting. Truth be told I would prefer that if  he had such information he would be the one to bring it out. Truth be told it turns out that the alleged act was never done by a person qua Minister but earlier in his career – which means that Joseph Muscat was lying when he implied that a Minister used his powers to free someone from the lockup (also not necessarily from prison). Truth be told this is not the first time that Muscat has been economical with a lie in order to imply an inexistent truth.

Truth be told I find the nationalist party’s assault on Toni Abela yawn-inducing and so blatantly a diversive tactic from its moment of panic. Truth be told I do agree that Abela should be responsible for his actions, particularly covering up of illicit activity in Labour’s kazini much the same way as I expect those responsible in the nationalist party to take the hit for any illicit activity in their kazini. Truth be told I still ask the most important question with regard to the PN’s recordings: Why now? Truth be told the nationalist party sat on this information for three whole years and only now felt sufficiently indignant to do anything about it.

Truth be told I have had enough of watching valuable pre-electoral debate time wasted in this battle of “your scandal is bigger than mine” or “oil purchasing is more important than drug trafficking” when it is blatantly obvious to anyone strong enough to wash off partisan blinkers that our supposed political elite is one big mess that is long past its sell-by date. Truth be told I have had enough of hearing snide comments about the hard-working folk at AD who can never yell about their presence loud enough so long as the village idiots are busy with their partisan banging and yelling about the inadequacy of the other side.

Truth be told this campaign is now expecting its final “election bomb”. It will be another “scandal” from each side announced close enough to the election date in order to hinder any possibility of throwing light and clarity on what it really is all about. It will be the mother of all messy mudballs slung by the mother of all slingshots. It will be as useful to our informed election of a proportionally representative parliament as a swimsuit in Alaska and yet the village idiots will indulge the parties with their Oohs, their Aahs and their chest beating.

Truth is, truth will never be told.

 

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Campaign 2013

Teleakkuza

In this time of accusations, double crossings and other such events that tickle the fancy of amateur sleuths and conspiracy theorists across the island J’accuse has decided to go retro and introduce a series of musical clips that we feel are related in one way or another to the hashtag from hell – #malta2013. We take our cue from a programme that would not be familiar to anyone under the age of 30 but that was all the rage in the early eighties. Superclassifica show with the famous gatto “Oscar” was our introduction to the musical scene… so let’s begin with the signature tune…

We’ll move on swiftly to a classic from the early nineties. Given all the finger pointing there’s bound to be someone denying the accusations so what better tune than this one by Shaggy – it’s all about the refrain innit?

Cool tune huh? Well we it seems that this is also the election of the snitches and of those who got busy recording conversations in order to spice up our conspiracy pages. Where else to look then if not towards that unintelligible one-hit faux-jamaican wonder snow?

See? A lickybombomdown eh…. inyerface Tony and Austin. Then there are the exes you know. It’s Valentine’s day so not a good day to mention them but hell… this one goes out to Anglu Farrugia… as they say on the radios this side of the world “special dedicasse”…

Still there? Well the dedicator gets a dedication. We know, we know, they were reeboks but it’s not our fault if Dear Leader don’t choose what’s cool and what’s in (though, of course, he’s in)… here’s the Kings of Rap extolling the virtues of Mr Daschler’s shoes…

Scratch… one more before we go. This is all about the parties’ flirting with the LGBT community. Expecting YMCA? Boring. We’ve got better, much better and it includes the lyrics we’d all love to yell at out politicians… (at least the first part)…. P.S. Is that Sheldon Cooper in the video?

We end with another retro throwback. The recently adopted national anthem of the highly successful satirical page from j’accuse – Bananarepublic…. good night and good luck.

Bonus Track.
Just because we like it.

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Campaign 2013

Snapshot # 3: The voters anonymous

The noise from the election campaign is becoming just that. It’s just like listening in to a mass meeting by a storm of locusts – noisy as ever but rarely makes sense. It happens every election. We kick off hoping to discuss issues, plans, projects and directions for the economy and society but more often than not we end up discussing scandals, allegations, ad hominem accusation and more such filth. This time round there is no shortage of finger pointing: amateur sleuths, wannabe lawyers and born-again-doubters are suddenly all into scandals and -gates. I’d pinpoint the genesis of this particularly heavy wave to the moment when the Sliema Local Council began to fall apart.

Now we have Oil Procurement gate replete with presidential pardons and alleged implications at ministerial level. We have Abela-gate with secret recordings allegedly uncovering a politician openly admitting what could amount to influencing the police force. We have the double edged sword of Zarb-gate: on the one hand a union caught trading in influence and on the other hand an alleged collusion between the businessman involved and the nationalist party. Meanwhile serious accusations of suspect funding to both parties have been swept under the carpet conveniently as each party prefers to concentrate on its scandal of choice – leaving questions about how millionaire campaigns are funded suspended in thin air.

This post can easily be misconstrued as being an attempt at minimising the importance of having an efficient system that uncovers any kind of fraudulent activity. It is not my intention to do so. What I intend to point out though is that much of this caravan and circus will eventually peter out come the 10th March. The horror, the shock and the awe that some politicians feign when confronted with proof (as demonstrative a proof as is available) will soon be relegated to the general “forget-me” bin only to be recycled five years down the line. Honestly. Do you remember the fuss and fantasy generated by Mistragate last time round? What of it?

The truth is that such shenanigans and uncovering of modus operandi of politicians and friends of politicians only SEEM to have become nastier. In reality our political system is geared to co-exist with the circles of power that surround it. Whether it is the police, the legal system, the big business or the unions, alliances are made and broken and fool you are if you think that any of the lot is innocent of such tomfoolery. The charade of investigations and holier-than-thou pronouncements (or as Toni Abela would have it… my banana is cleaner than yours) is just that.

My question and next point is how much does that influence the voter. All these theatricals are for the voter’s inconvenience in the end. They are meant to point out the inadequacy of the other side because the other side is Corrupt/Hapless/Undisciplined (take your pick). Does the voter care? Reading Roberto Saviano on La Repubblica I had a chance to confirm what could be a Mediterranean or even a European trait. Oftentimes the voter is just as enmeshed in the power circles that are at work. The difference in the voter’s case is that he falls further down the line of enjoyment but still feels the compulsion to confirm his participation and thus develop a legitimate expectation. It’s all about a job, a sick relative or a parking space.

Yes. Often the voters’ priority (beyond the obvious partisan impulse) is based purely on one particular service (or inversely is the result of one particular disservice). Is it a refused MEPA permit for altering one’s balcony? Is it a refused rebate on a taxed imported car? Is it a refused access into a school? When you hear the opposition complaining about the “power of incumbency” what they are complaining about is the fact that they have less clout in this not so covert black market where promises to fill gaps in voters’ needs are traded. Do not be deceived. The trading is across the board – opposition or government. The promises are there for everyone. Because Malta Taghna Lkoll is really a euphemism for the politician’s position in the system of cogs and wheels that gets this republic going. It’s not just Labour’s slogan. It’s everybody’s.

Voters will not really be impressed by the many -gates. They either had made their mind up before the scandals surfaced or had their ideas confirmed by the plethora of accusations. In some quarters pundits will try to sell the idea of a “responsible” vote one that supposedly is made in the best interests of the country. It’s a load of bull really. Those very pundits are motivated by the cogs and wheels that get this country going. Knowingly or unknowingly their vote is pre-conditioned by this state of affairs.

A responsible vote is one that tries its damn best to change the system. It is one that requires at least 2000 anonymous voters in one district voting on the basis of what the nation needs and not on the idea that they will get some form of personal reward. Sadly the power of incumbency of the old style politicians will probably mean that the responsible voter loses out. Again.

 

 

 

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Campaign 2013

Snapshot #2 : Muscat – the Cheshire Cat

Muscat is another of the supposed “European” graduates and the Labour party will never cease reminding us that fact. Has the Labour leader delivered the revolution he had promised when he boldly stood on the stage and put his hand on heart stating “Inhobbkom”? We’ve been documenting the steps of this Labour party since the ex-Super One hack was proclaimed leader. Remember Labour in Labour? Remember all that hope and promise of a new direction? Well the product is there for all to see now.

It is evident that, unlike Simon Busuttil, Muscat quickly realised that there was not really much of the EP heritage that would really be useful in Malta. Sure you could bluff and boast about having sat shoulder to shoulder with an international mix of politicians and representatives. You could even have had your great moment when you refused to proceed unless Maltese interpretation could be provided. Beyond that nothing. Look at what the smiling and smug Muscat has produced in these election days and you will find anything but a European or Europeanist party.

Muscat’s solution was two fold. First of all Labour had to divest itself from being Labour. Hence the “Moviment” (they quickly dropped the progressiv business when many inherent contradictions became glaringly obvious). Muscat had learn the lesson from the PN spin team in 2008 – and the keyword here was taste. Voters are very particular about this and behind Muscat’s middle class promises lie a sensitivity to this particularly hypocritical self-assessment. A corollary of this cosmetic intervention is the apparent abolishing of “us and them” confrontational politics. This in itself was a double-sided coin. On the one hand Muscat’s movement needed to be seen as all inclusive (the magical Obama Chant Taghna Lkoll) while on the other hand if there was to be any “us and them” left it would have to be The Movement vs The Oligarchy/Clique/GonziPN leftovers.

So there was no longer a Labour party. Just a movement headed by one figure in a very presidential style approach that worked so well for GonziPN in 2008. Then came Muscat’s second part of the solution. This involved a heavy dose of populism and opportunism in policy framing that would be dished out in a breathtaking blitzkrieg approach that would not allow those who are supposed to assess it any time to think. The movement’s strategy is based on impressions – gay-friendliness, supposed green credentials and an infusion of hope that is really simply a polite way of saying “let’s get those bastards out of castille”.

You never get enough time to assess Muscat’s grin he’s already shifting and morphing to please someone else. To the seasoned political observer it is all plastic, inconsistent and very very evidently short term planning. It is also very dangerously a winning tactic. The problem with the Cheshire cat in the end was the fact that it could not be beheaded because there was no body to behead. Muscat is very much the same. His public appearances mean everything to everyone who really wants to believe that there is an alternative to that motley crew that is on it’s last hours of life. Look beneath the appearances and promises though and you find that there is nary a policy that can be holistically assessed beyond being the result of a “focus group generated policy” – which is only politispeak for “just promise whatever that particular segment wants and then we’ll deal with the consequence later.

Muscat is a star. He has fit perfectly with the Maltese way of doing politics by concocting the combined formula of cosmetic blitzkrieg and bandwagon hopping. He’s very very good at that. This will probably win the man the premiership of a country. Having seen the how of his enormous success at the polls should lead many to the obvious conclusion that he will not be so comfortable with the next step. it appears that even that conclusion is not enough to make voters change their mind.

I’d hate to see their face the moment the Cheshire Cat vanishes and we are left with an annoying grin hanging in the air.

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Campaign 2013 Mediawatch

Il-punt (Ħadd ieħor)

U il-baġit? Il-baġit ġa lest. Il-gvernijiet ewropej ftehmu fl-aħħar. Għandna baġit ewropew. Ovvjament f’żokrot id-dinja jgħodd biss il-biljun u ftit li twiegħdu lil Malta. Mhux li ta min jissottovaluta dan il-fatt. Anzi xieraq ngħidu li l-gvern preżenti ma setgħax jagħlaq ħidmietu b’akkiwst isbaħ u ikbar. La l-Laburisti ma jistgħu ixejnuh għax vera huwa akkwist enormi u wisq inqas ma għandhom in-nazzjonalisti jeqirdu li “issa se jgawdihom Muscat” għax jew mar jinnegozja fi Brussel għal Malta jew le (Gonzi).

Imma oltre in-numru fantaxjentifiku (għax immens) ta’ ewri li se jaslu b’xi mod jew ieħor għal tgawdija (sakemm ma jonfquhomx fuq proġetti imbażwra li jservu biss biex jinfurraw bwiet min ma ħaqqux – u f’dak il-każ nafu min igawdi), oltre dan kollu hemm l-imaġni ukoll ta’ Ewropa mhix daqstant magħquda li qed taqdef f’dgħajsa imbenġla fl-ibħra ta’ kriżi dejjiem li għad ma trdix taf tbatti. Din ir-realta tmur oltre il-kwalunkwiżmi elettorali frott ta’ diskors forzatament partiġġjan.

L-Ewropa qed tipprova tqum fuq saqajha. Hi ukoll (u hi tfisser aħna tafux) għandha programmi u proġetti – tixtieq tinvesti iktar f’impjiegi għax jekk forsi ma tafux il-qgħad u l-prekarju fl-Ewropa huwa ħafna ħafna agħar minn dak li taraw Malta. Tixtieq tagħti nifs ġdid lill-ekonomija. Tixtieq tħajjar iktar investiment. Tixtieq ħafna l-Ewropa. Imma għaddejja minn żmien fejn kullħadd jiġbed għal djul għajnu l-Ewropa ukoll. Hemm min qed jaħsibha jibqax ġewwa. Hemm min jixtieq jibqa ġewwa imma li jrid li tikkalma ftit mir-regoli sakemm jieħu nifs. Hemm min fehem li r-regoli huma bosta li issa jagħtuna drittijiet ġodda u li mingħajr dawn ir-regoli ma tibnix Ewropa.

It-tensjoni hija kbira. Is-sens ta’ camaraderie ilu li intefa’. F’dan id-dawl biss, il-ftehm li intlaħaq il-bieraħ huwa suċċess enormi għall-ikbar għaqda fil-kontinent il-qadim. Jaf, minkejja kollox jagħti tama. Jaf li – sakemm l-Ewropa issib l-illuminazzjoni ta’ mexxejja b’rieda vera li jagħtu missjoni dejjiema lill-proġett, sakemm in-nazzjonaliżmi tal-paniku u l-firda tal-biżgħa jittaffew – jaf li dan il-ftehim jagħti dik l-ispinta neċessarja biex il-proġett jibqa jaħdem minkejja kollox.

Raġuni li tiżboq il-biljun u mitejn miljun raġuni li għandna għal xiex nifirħu bihom bħalissa.

Għax l-Ewropa, issa iktar minn qatt qabel, tagħna lkoll.