j'accuse

Rent-A-Piano (distractive interlude)

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Having trouble dealing with “the people”? An ungrateful electorate has just given you a right royal whupping at the polls? Is your electorate in need of a timely distraction? No plans and nowhere to go? Having trouble roping in your colleagues in cabinet? Has every news topic been a points killer at the opinion polls? Are your spinmeisters doing a shit job at reigning the people back behind you in adulating crowds?

No worries. The solution is a just round the corner.

Rent-A-Piano

…that’ll get them whistling the tune you like …. 

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Jacques René Zammit

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17 responses to “Rent-A-Piano (distractive interlude)”

  1. Sully Avatar
    Sully

    L-ispinmeisters jidhru inkazzati seww. Kif ukoll l-opinjonisti li “ma jiktbux” riklami tal-PN. Ara Daphne illum. Kif jghidu illum? “Take a chill pill”? Jien nahseb ahjar skoss Valium…..u forsi xi girja mas-sit tat teatru imwaqqa biex xi hadd inehhi ftit sonza u jikkalma ftit….

  2. Joe Cassar Avatar
    Joe Cassar

    Daphne has been trying to pick a fight with Astrid Vella and the FAA for days.

    Wisely they are ignoring her and she is getting more furious and hystrical by the hour.

  3. anna Avatar
    anna

    I cannot understand this obsession with Astrid either…after all, its not like Renzo Piano has to actually wait for her seal of approval to go ahead with the project…
    as joe cassar said…astrid’s silence seems to me infuriating dcg…but I’m mystified as to why?

  4. Daphne Caruana Galizia Avatar
    Daphne Caruana Galizia

    It’s reining, Jacques, not reigning. Queens reign. Horses have reins.

    It’s nice to see you’ve given the Daphne4Dummies people a home. They must have been at a bit of a loss. Kind of you.

    “I cannot understand this obsession with Astrid either” – coming from one of my cyber-stalkers, that’s pretty rich.

  5. Joe Cassar Avatar
    Joe Cassar

    The reason is not hard to find, Anna.

    Daphne wants revenge on Astrid cos she had a part in torpedoing a pet project of DCG’s Master (RCC).

  6. Jacques Rene Zammit Avatar
    Jacques Rene Zammit

    @Daphne: You’re right of course. Re the spelling error of reigning vs reining. I do that often, misspell homonyms, that is. It’s quite a pain but I do find that it has often been a source of entertainment for pedants visiting the blog… I guess you noticed by now that this blog keeps attracting all sorts. Hell, it even inspires some people to start blogs of their own.

    @Everyone else: I’m off to play footie so will change the spelling later.

    Queens reign. They also strut, throw tantrums and miss the wood for the trees. In case you allow yourself to get distracted, the point of this satirical post was that the Piano plan might be just what the doctor ordered for the government and its spin: getting you to talk about Piano’s merits and demerits, and yes… of course the all important question: Where’s Astrid?

    Like we care!

    Well, you can bring a horse to the water but you sure as hell cannot get it to drink. Reins or no reigns.

  7. Joe Cassar Avatar
    Joe Cassar

    Leave the “ruined” spelling as it is and just build a cage around it, Jacques.

    That’s what Piano wants to do.

  8. Daphne Caruana Galizia Avatar
    Daphne Caruana Galizia

    Joe Cassar – do I know you? Obviously not. However, given the surfeit of Hello magazine material on this island, I fully accept the burden of providing a public service in the form of a suitable subject for gossip by bored housewives and jealous men who are generally both short and ineffective. After 20 years I’m used to it – though I’ll admit I think it’s extraordinary that you lot still haven’t found someone else to talk about.

  9. Sully Avatar
    Sully

    @Jacques – Jista jkun li kif tghid int, din ta biebil-belt ecc hi is-soltu distrazzjoni tal-PN…imma insomma ta min isir xi haga fuq il-post….issa naraw….jekk l-ghan ta l-ezercizzju hu li johloq ftit spin posittiv ghal gvern ma nafx kemm qed jahdem…..
    @ Daphne – Ikkalma jahasra…. qisek hargulek il-morliti. Jekk jaharqek ghal Piano tajjeb….halli min ma jaqbilx mieghek jghid tieghu qabel ma tinfexx fi skoss tghajjir u vojtagni….jew almenu zomm dak it-tghajjir ghal blog u artikli tieghek. M’ghidtx li wiehed seta jevitak jekk irid u li m’intix bhal gamm imdellek ma kullimkien? Milli qed naqra (fuq it-Times, f’dan il-blog, fl-artikli tieghek) ma tantx baqa possibbli tevitak ghax qed titfa l-kummenti kullimkien. Veru li mhux bhal gamm (li xejn xejn hu helu)imma qisek xi ghadira ta diarrohea tiskula kullimkien…..(Skuzani Jacques….)

  10. Robert Zammit Avatar
    Robert Zammit

    “Alo, Renzo?”

    “Ciao, Eddie, come va?”

    “No, no, sono Lawrence.”

    “Ah, dimmi, dimmi, carissimo…”

  11. Bilbo Avatar
    Bilbo

    Would DCG have been so enthusiastic about the Piano plans had they been commissioned by a Labour Government? Highly unlikely.

    This self-avowed Liberal also manages to find sense in being cheerleader in chief of the ultra-conservative Nationalist party. I guess consistency is not the woman’s forte.

  12. anna Avatar
    anna

    HI Daphne pleased to meet you at last :)
    but may I ask why are you calling me a cyber stalker?
    Ma fhimtx…

  13. Daphne Caruana Galizia Avatar
    Daphne Caruana Galizia

    Bilbo, liberal politics are not about the regulation of sexual relationships. If anything, liberal politics would be about the opposite of that. Please don’t demonstrate your political ignorance by assuming that liberals are people who favour divorce and gay marriage. Divorce is universal, so one would assume that the planet’s right-wingers favour it. And if you look closely enough, you will see that I am probably the only heterosexual person in the country speaking in favour of civil unions for homosexuals. Not even ‘Joseph’ is doing that, lest he lose the approval of the local grannies. All the other people speaking in favour are homosexuals themselves, which makes them not liberal but people with a vested personal interest.

  14. Bilbo Avatar
    Bilbo

    My point is that even though you say you are in favour of divorce and civil unions for gays, you still cheerlead for the Nationalist party.

    Give me a G
    Give me an O
    Give me an N
    Give me a Z
    Give me an I

    GONZI! …. ah x’jahraqni!!!

  15. Daphne Caruana Galizia Avatar
    Daphne Caruana Galizia

    Bilbo, it’s a hell of a lot better than cheer-leading for Labour or AD. Remind me what they stand for, exactly?

  16. Ettore Bono Avatar
    Ettore Bono

    The DON’T stand for handing over absolute power to one shadowy, unelected individual and his stable of media hitmen (and women).

  17. Bilbo Avatar
    Bilbo

    Daphne, did I mention the PL or AD? Typical Maltese mentality, when one criticizes the PN, PL is brought into the equation.

    The fact that Stalin killed more people than Hitler does not automatically make Hitler a ‘Ragel sew’!