One for the Letzeburg residents. I thought of using J’accuse to plug the better half’s more productive hobby/passion. For more information go to the site: www.kangoo.lu . I’ve tried the boots and believe you me… it’s fun (though too much exercise for the likes of couch potato/FIFA12 me). If you’re not in Luxembourg and would love to try the boots… well, that’s tough.

J’accuse is finally tying the knot and it’s seven days to W-day. I’ve dragged this announcement long enough in the hope that I might throw in a few more posts before the final rush and hustle and bustle. The last week will involve an incredibly full schedule and the week after the wedding will (obviously) involve a deserved rest and chill out. Which means that you are being served with an “out of office” notice by J’accuse while we are away tying knots. We will probably be back on the 15th November with the J’accuse column on the Malta Independent resuming on the 20th.

For those who follow us on tumblr there might be a few photographic surprises or one word reflections every now and then. (n case you never noticed our tumblr posts also appear at the bottom of the J’accuse main page. We’re also on twitter of course: @jacqueszammit

So please bear with us for the longest pause in J’accuse blogging yet. It’s for a good cause…

 
Here’s a bit of a marriage story for Halloween… (I’ll change this midweek don’t worry)

I’m off to Bologna this weekend. I’m supposed to be looking forward to a weekend of drunken excess since I will be “celebrating” my bachelor’s party. The thing is I’ve never been an enthusiastic participant at this kind of event – I’m more like the wet blanket at such occasions. Most times I end up man marking the more excessive and crazy members of the crowd trying to ensure that no physical harm is done.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m the first in line for practical jokes and love a good laugh when the prank is well thought out. It’s just that the wankellectual snob doesn’t relate to the primitive idea of stripping, strapping and throwing up that seems to be the sum total of a bachelor party activity on the island. Give me a “Zingarata” any day… but hell, how do you explain the Monicelli concept in this day and age?

So yep, I am off, packing my bags for the city of three T’s (that’s apparently Tits, Towers and Tortellini). Given that my level of alcohol resistance is that of a three year old thanks to my having switched to tea or diet coke as beverages of choice you may very well hear of a Maltese national having been arrested in Bologna after being discovered trawling the streets naked covered in whatever inventive substance passes as fun at a bachelors these days.

Still. The good thing is that the intercettati will be passing through Bologna on Saturday night. With a bit of luck (make that a lot in my case) I might witness the face of the disappointed intercettato fan first hand. Forza Bologna! Forza Di Vaio!

Back on Monday! (fingers crossed)

While I was busy posting about hacks yesterday (De Moribus Viator) J’accuse (the blog) was being mightily rogered by some mini-genius hacker. That shot most of the afternoon for me trying to understand why the hell any outside links to J’accuse were being redirected to some weird site with a .ru appendage. I say for me but what I really mean is for me and a number of very friendly co-bloggers and savvy acquaintances who wracked their collective brains to solve this mysterious problem. We could come up with some conspiracy theory and claim that some underground movement of J’accuse haters planned to block access to the site. We could, but we already know what measures are taken by those who find J’accuse’s sting too hard to digest – besides it would be attributing too much net savviness to them for our liking.

Instead we discovered eventually that the hack was in the form of some script that plants itself onto your site (expressly a wordpress run site) following the installation or update of templates that have been purchases. It’s a smart little bit of program that (from what I understand) suddenly plonks itself on the receiving end of your site and redirects traffic to some weird destination registered in Russka. J’accuse would like to thank SL, MB and RV for their kind attention and attempts (finally successful) to solve the frustrating issue.

So if you tried clicking on J’accuse links yesterday (particularly from Facebook) and failed to reach the hallowed ground of this blog you now have the reason why. We would also like to reassure readers that no viruses or other similar devious contraptions could have been caught by clicking on links. At most your click will have taken you on a virtual trip to Russia and who knows were else… and denied you the daily dose of quality blogging.

Merci.

Cocks

Living in the countryside is a lifestyle choice associated with the fresh air, the greenery and the calm. When we chose to move into a converted chateau a while back (it’s converted into apartments mind you) we had the idea of rural countryside bliss in mind. What I did not count on is the cock (tee-hee – note: this bracket has been included to fit with what counts as trendy in this day and age) that is a permanent fixture in our neighbour’s menagerie.

This morning I was unable to find the snooze button on the persistent sound that seemed to have taken over my alarm clock. The crowing of the cock was surely planned by the same devious bastard who had scheduled early morning mowing of lawns and clearing of paths on Saturdays in the Parc de Merl. I am sure that this particular rooster has a magna cum louder (sic) in statistical mechanics and opts to crow at apposite intervals designed to torture the brain of even the most innocent bystander.

Trying to catch an extra half hour snooze in the morning? Epic fail. Give me urban regularity any time. I must say though that I am definitely not looking forward to the noises of Paceville waking up in the morning come (tee-hee) next week.

Debts

I am no genius in the grander economic theories of the way things work in our lives but I follow the news enough to know that what happened last night in the US of A will have huge repercussions on the order of things in the Western World (and par consequence beyond). The lawmakers of the great nation finally agreed on a manner in which to deal with impending doom of financial meltdown. They did so by voting for the only way out – increasing debt levels and increasing spending cuts.

We might have the very wrong impression that this will only affect people on the other side of the ocean but while we are immersed in navel-gazing exercises and dabbling with redefining Maltese concepts of political correctness (wrongly, I hasten to addf) the bite of the current treatment phase of the financial armageddon will definitely be felt in Malta too. I can’t wait for the next government to reopen the whole “Hofor” speak. The really cool (it’s sarcasm Jim, but you wouldn’t know it) thing is that the two options we have: Inhobbkom J or a New Faction of PN could both choose to blindly blame it on the Gonz while navigating the economy into darker waters. Spiffin.

To Do or not To Do

I currently have the attention span of a bluebottle fly in a rubbish tip. That is probably why blogging on J’accuse has become even more sporadic than is usual in the desert of the summer months when most people do not even sit at their pc’s anyway. In any case the appointed date for the joining of fates approaches at breakneck speed (1hr/hr) my mind seems to have wandered into a capsule which I timeshare with various to-do lists that are my curse.

It’s not like I have to plan Malta’s new transport system or anything but in between little chores related to nuptial preparations, moving of houses and final touches at the workplace before the long Ferragosto, I find myself swimming in a sea of shifting deadlines that defy any attempt of self-control.

There. That has to be it for the day. We hope you have enjoyed this running commentary of random ramblings from the greyish skies of Luxembourg. Have a good one till the next post. And don’t forget we are also on tumblr for the experienced browser’s perusal..

J’accuse will be performing some changes over the next coming days in view of the “summer” (and may I add pre-wedding) blogging period. Don’t worry there will not be any stories about purchase of tails and rental of halls. It’s just that we will be experimenting with the concept of “microblogging” and seeing whether it integrates well with the idea of shorter, concise thoughts for this blog. You’ll get a chance to tell me what you think. In the meantime look out for a re-vu-like switch for the next few days as we work on the micro-blogging idea.

J’accuse was featured on Luxembourg’s CityMag June ’11 edition. Being the vainglorious wankellectual that I am I am not particularly keen on the accompanying photo but hey… check it out. You can read the full edition here – the Malta special is on pages 24-25.

We’ve installed a new app on the J’accuse template. You’ve been complaining for some time now but the problem is finally solved. Left-handed readers of J’accuse will finally be able to enjoy the full blogging experience on J’accuse thanks to LeftInside™: the nippy little program that breaks down the barrier between the left and right hemispheres of the brain. Firefox, Chrome and Opera users should notice the change immediately (n case you don’t just refresh the page and count till 3) while Internet Explorer users should get a life.

So there you are. J’accuse is now an equal opportunity blogging experience thanks to the wonders of science. Don’t thank me… thank the progress for the left!

Today J’accuse turns six. We’ve gone a (very) long way since the 10th of March 2005. Both the national and international blogosphere have changed tremendously as befits the speed of change in the ether. From the definition of Wankellectual (first introduced on the 15th March 2005 when some bloggers had no idea the blog world even existed) to today’s commenting of the Jasmine Revolution we’ve seen all sorts of changes.

J’accuse never underestimated the power of the net. Thanks to  Mark Vella (Xifer – let’s give credit where it is due) and his constant nagging, I set up a blog and we kicked off somewhat hesitatingly back then. Six years. That’s an eternity on the net. We like to believe that although we provoke and criticise we do so fairly – in the supreme interest of the discovery of the truth. In fact, notwithstanding so many changes we insist on keeping one thing constant: quality blogging.

Which is why we urge you not to be selfish. Pass the word and share the (free) links. J’accuse… the truth if I lie… will still be blogging for a time yet (so you don’t have to).

Merci
Jacques

Interesting Facts (will be updated)

***
Here’s a blogroll from our first year (2005), give us a shout if you recognise your blogname (I’ve put some authors in brackets). This, my friends was Blogosfera Mark I (apologies for the absence of (mostly dead) links:

Quod Principi Placquit

Triq il-Maqluba (Antoine Cassar)
Malta 9 Thermidor (Fausto Majistral)
Books & Beans (Pierre Mejlak)
Inutile de Dejeuner (Gybexi)
Wired Temples (Robert Micallef)
Ajjut! Ajjut! (A.O.)
Neebother (Justin BB)

In alio pediculum

Xifer (Mark Vella)
Tgedwid
Xemx u Xita (Alex Vella Gera)
Nigredo (Nigredo)
Waweasill
Bananazzurri
Chef Condom
Toni Sant (as himself)

Illiud Latine dici non potest

Diverse Ramblings (Maltagirl)
Kenneth (the guy from Mellieha)
Lost in Thought (Sharon Spiteri)
Rites of Passage (hmm)
Thea (…) Planet
Hsibijiet
il-Krizi…u kif teghlibha (Alex Vella Gera)
Rupert Cefai (Bertu)
L-Istrordut Kroniku
Le Pont Mirabeau
Mill-Art (AVG)

***

For all of it’s current lease of life J’accuse has been based in Luxembourg City. It will be moving (along with us) by May 1st to Dondelange, a tiny village on the outskirts of Luxembourg City – follow the move on J’accuse.

***

Non Sequitur is the longest running rubrique of J’accuse. It has not yet reached 100 posts.

***

Last year J’accuse introduced the Zolabyte – a running series of guest posts inspired by the original J’accuser Emile Zola.

***

J’accuse was awarded a prize for quality blogging at thê THINKABOUTIT! blogging competition organised by the European Journalism Centre (EJC).

***

J’accuse is also available on twitter, facebook and as a column The Malta Independent on Sunday.

A serialised long post intended to reassure readers that while we normally let sleeping dogs lie there is no reason to believe that we are reluctant to call a spade a spade.

N.B. To be read in doses. Reminder to Daphne-lites: You are free not to read on. On the other hand the breaking down into parts of this post is intended to facilitate cutting and pasting for better presentation while posting in other blogs’ comment sections.

I

The intellectual standards of this too-complicated-for-plebs blog do not normally allow us (the Royal We for Wankellectuals) to descend into the pits of mud-slinging that can be discovered daily in other quarters of the Maltese blogging world.

Back in 2007 J’accuse (6 on the 10th of March) had a tough time moderating the bitching and haggling in the comment section. Having realised belatedly the usefulness of the new media (thanks to the eyeopening sessions on J’accuse in mid-election campaign) some of those commentators went on to open blogs  of their own… perpetuating their inimitable style developed in the comment section.

II

That was then. Meanwhile, we remained happy to discuss politics and not people, ideas and not looks, values not prejudices – all the while observing the development of the use of the new media. We continued to ask questions – in particular with regards to different parts of the Fourth Estate. Others chose what a colleague of mine called the Slash and Burn style of journalism – and got their accolades from their acolytes.

Today, I feel obliged to put up this post after a sincere demonstration of concern by readers who via e-mails and phone calls wondered whether I would ever reply to what appears to be a sudden fixation by Daphne Caruana Galizia on what she calls a “Class A Wanker” (actually she claims to have called me so several times bah… sticks, stones and girls in a playground).

III

I would normally have no time to check the lesser side of her blog – the Runs – having long abandoned any hope of finding any intelligent conversation by the various aliases. I have no problem with checking Daphne’s daily postings because I cannot honestly expect to comment on the internet news without taking into account other blogger’s points of view and slants on the news. I have no time to waste on the ramblings of the Daphne-lites in the comments section though and were it not for the signalling by J’accuse readers and a sudden mention in a post attacking an article by Saviour Balzan (but mainly based on the usual “guilt by association” approach – more on this later)  I would not have noticed the revival of the DCG fixation.

It transpires that a few Daphne-lites have been stoking the columnist’s easily flammable temper by posting interesting observations about myself or my blog. It also turns out that Daphne is stupid enough to think that I would actually post on her blog with an alias. I have never hidden behind an alias and never will. What did happen – as I confirmed by using common sense and a bit of research – is that a person who commented regularly on this blog (using his first name to boot), and who is based in Luxembourg, started to do so on Daphne’s (using the same first name).

The paranoid reaction to the endless nit-picking by this particular commentator was to send him back to “his own blog” to play. Yawn-inducing paranoia had come into play.

IV

Daphne and the Daphne-lites have a fixation with the unreadability of this blog. Incredibly they also have a knack of referring to it constantly. Does that classify as irony? Sadly for the rent-a-crowd in that corner of the net J’accuse shows no signs of abating and remains a steady reference point for the more balanced approach to analysing current affairs. (Did I mention that we turn 6 on the 10th of March?).

Of course our analysis might not always fit in to the jigsaw puzzle of the World as Seen from the Runs. Here are a few (unanswered) examples:

• PLATEGATE or Why Now? Part 1: J’accuse was the ONLY presence in any part of the press asking the most pertinent question in the Daphne Caruana Galizia vs Consuelo Scerri Herrera saga. If Daphne had collected such a wealth of information over a long period of time alleging inappropriate behaviour by a Magistrate … what prompted her to start blogging about it?  Why did she choose that particular moment? Was it so hard to admit that it had nothing to do with civic conscience or journalistic probity? WHY NOW?
• RAYMOND CARUANA or Why Now? Part 2: Almost a year passed and we had a similar situation. DCG upped the ante on Illum journalist Julia Farrugia. Suddenly more than 25 years after the actual facts DCG developed an acute sense of journalistic investigation and went on a whole trip piecing publicly available information together to develop a story. What you think about the story is irrelevant. Daphne’s timing is not. It is irresponsible to say the least. But very typical of journalism that is not at the service of the public and the truth. It is journalism at the service and use of private means and ends. I don’t buy the stories of Daphne being some poodle to RCC or some other masters bidding her to do this and that. What I do read is a very unprofessional and unethical application of journalistic skill. Why now indeed?
• JPO: Funny how JPO is now accusing Daphne in court (under oath) of being a slave to political masters – ready to do some spin damage at their beck and call. J’accuse can vouch that Daphne was busy insulting anyone who dared criticise crocodile tear Jeffrey during the Mistra saga. She backed the nationalist party’s outright defence of the man even in such instances when he was given a press card to ask questions to Alfred Sant. Press decency my backside… the imperative was save Jeffrey… save the party. Especially from people who were “setting themselves up as objects of hate”… yep this was the time when Daphne heaped insults on anyone who dared propose that the PL/PN option was a blind, valueless cul-de-sac…. we would be vindicated come the divorce issue (among others).. but hey what counted was the character assassination at the time.

V

Taste. Daphne is big on guilt by association and character assassination. Who will ever forget the “zokk u fergha” campaign? Just look now at the Mintoff-Labour-Gaddafi saga as Daffers turns into a one-woman CNN of sorts reporting such great events as which flag is flying over the Libyan embassy in between harassing Graffiti poster carriers in wolf-in-sheeps’ clothing outfit.

The Saviour Balzan post referred to above was a clumsy attempt at throwing a number of perceived “nasties” together. Here’s the list of persons supposedly manning the barricades in some imagined revolution :

Salvu Balzan, Roger de Giorgio, JPO, the Prisoner of Zenda from Brussels, Matthew Vella, Al Jazeera Stagno Navarra, Choccies Benoit, Josanne Cassar, Secret Weapon Astrid, Julia tal-Guy, Charlon ta’ Albertown, xi Claire Bonello max-shag ta’ Norman Lowell, Ronnie Pellegrini, David Friggieri and Jacques Rene Zammit. Jason Micallef will man the field hospital and the Communications Coconut can be used to sneak messages below the radar across AnAmy lines. Don’t forget to take Reno Calleja with you, my dears, u xi AST ukoll ghax dak espert kbir fir-regimes. U jekk ghandkom bzonn xi covert operative, tinsewx li ghandkom il-Guy tat-Tunny Net.

 

Hospitals, covert operatives, regimes… jeez imagination does run wild at night doesn’t it? Oh Well, should our revolution ever need a kitchen stocked with such WMDs as crockery of the finest kind we know who to turn to don’t we?

In one fell swoop Jacques René Zammit is equal to Reno Calleja is equal to Ronnie Pellegrini is equal to Roger Degiorgio etc etc. It’s obvious. If you haven’t swallowed the “blog is unreadable” line then you might as well believe that Jacques Zammit, Reno Calleja, AST and Franco Farrugia (another one bandied around who I do not know from Adam) have one and the same objective.

Anybody who knows me or any of the above would know that this couldn’t be further from the truth. Daphne is more comfortable avoiding subjects such as Plategate or constructive criticism of the faults in our representatives operation and chooses to build on the guilt by association. The frenetic, paranoid attempt at bunching everyone who she disagrees with into one caricatured bundle is much easier on the mind of her readers anyway.

That way she can let fire with the Wanker or unmarried or nerd or whatever she perceives as the latest trendy insult…

VI

So yes. We’ve taken some time to look at why Daphne has suddenly worried our readers with a few gratuitous insults aimed our way.

Read my lips (or my characters):

Jacques René Zammit has never insulted Daphne Caruana Galizia.

I have criticised her modus operandi. I have criticised her argument but I have NEVER insulted the person.

There must be something to be read in the fact that Daphne Caruana Galizia has never replied to any of the critical arguments posited here and elsewhere. If the answer, like her friend Lou’s is that she does not read the blog… that it is boring …it still does not explain the insults. If you chose to take note of criticism then you might as well have the decency to reply with counterarguments. Insults or character attacking with guilt by association does not help.

Don’t get me wrong. Insult as much as you like.. after all it is a free world and I am fully aware of the heat and kitchen argument. It’s just that it is good for readers to know where the insults are coming from and what they are all about. It goes without saying that the level of insults, inventions and character assassination attempts will be expected to increase over the coming days.

I’ll do my damn best not to bother much with anything coming my way from that corner of the net and I kindly ask readers to do the same. J’accuse goes on with its publish and be damned approach at blogging.

This wankellectual is almost done. Now for the finale… the answer you have all been waiting for:

VI

What is the difference between John Galliano and Daphne Caruana Galizia?

One tends to dress weirdly, hurl abusive insults in what sounds like an alcoholic rage and has a funny moustache when all made up…

…  the other was fired by Dior.

When they say let sleeping dogs lie… it doesn’t mean you have to allow them to twist the truth. – J’accuse 2011

ADDENDUM: Note to TYOM people. You will inevitably reproduce this post because it deals with your pet hate. I know it is useless “forbidding” you to do so because what is good for the goose is good for the gander but if you do so then also have the decency to publish this addendum:

J’accuse DOES NOT and WILL NEVER endorse, support or in any way agree with TYOM, its content or its style.This kind of site can only be a disservice to the idea of proper use of new media and to the proper development of political discussion.

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